Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Meanwhile in a office across town

I got a skype message from a guy who has been reading my blog.
He said that for all the posts on sex that there is not actual sex on my blog.

Well no. I blog about relationships not sex. Even when I mention sex I don't talk about it.
He could not understand why.

With all the sites out there on the web that are devoted to the act of sex, do you really need my encounters on the page in black and white descriptive text?
No. No you do not.
And as much as I am trying to turn myself into a real life Carrie Bradshaw, everyone has to draw the line somewhere. And this is where my prudeness creeps in and takes over.

So to the guy on skype who asked...

Sunday, June 28, 2009

Love Letters of Great Men

I am not talking about the book, though I would love to get my greedy paws on a copy. If I knew which book it really was.
Since the Sex and the City movie came out last year, and since at the time it was a prop for the film, and since at the time it sent so many of us scampering off to the book stores hunting it down, well since all that two authors have put together a different book on the idea.
I have no clue which one is based on the prop book they used in the movie. I might actually have to buy both.

But I digress, as I was not talking about the book. I am talking about the idea of men writing love letters. I would love it ;no pun intended, if men today actually followed that example. And no boys a "love fax" (like Mr. Big offers Carrie in the movie) does not count.
I mean a real sheet of paper, a real writing tool, a real envelope and a real guy sitting down expressing his thoughts, emotions, and desires towards me.
I want that. I really really want that.

Other then SATC movie what brought this on ? I read alot of Jane Austen. I watch alot of Jane Austen. Letters are the big thing in a Jane Austen story. Mr. Darcy confesses his love for Elizabeth in Pride and Prejudice, Mr. Wentworth confesses his never ending want of Anne Elliot in Persuasion both by letters. These are two of my favourite stories of all time, my two favourite heroes of all time. They were not afraid of the idea of pouring themselves into a letter.
So why are all the men in this day and age barely able to type a full sentence?

I am always talking about my perfect guy and what he would be like and this is a major key to him. My hunky hero will not be afraid of love letters nor will he be afraid of Jane Austen.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

Are there any single straight men left on this planet? part 7

Went to coffee with Sci-Fi Guy. I have to say, except for the sudden down pour as we were leaving the coffee shop, it was a swell time. He had the clearest blue eyes I have ever seen.
How blue? Ocean blue, ice blue, Chris Sabin blue.

For those who have been reading my stuff for the last few years, you know that I don't normally date other writers, (Dargo was the exception to the rule few years ago, but then he was the exception to alot of my rules) there just seems to be a competition when you get two writers together. Ever since Mr. B. way back in high school I have tried to make sure I am the only writer/reporter in any relationship.

I don't think I made as stunning an impression on him as he did on me. Partly because I arrived with Chris Sabin hair (bad hair that just would not work in the heat) and then ended up with Wet Chris Sabin hair (bad hair that just would not work in the heat plastered to my face in rain drenched strips dripping hairspray into my eyes) and partly because he did not try to make a second date at all. I did all the trying.

Friday, June 26, 2009

My Thoughts on TNA Impact for June 25 2009

Listen iTunes Canada, you have got to get Impact ready for download alot sooner then you have been. I had to hunt it down on the net again. That takes alot of time, and given I am a lazy person.....

We pick up after the ppv (will I ever get to see a ppv? ) and open the show with Brutus Magnus vs...a jumping by Brother Ray. It was suppose to be a street fight (I hate those) between them. The run in by the other members of the British Invasion plus the rest of the non-american scheme was a predictable thing. And then a run in save by Devon with a chair. Bored now. And of course the crowd goes mad for it. Still bored.

Samoa Joe's part of the MEM? Ah man. Now that I did not see coming. This should be an interesting twist in the summer storylines. The creative team gets a cookie for that. When you can surprise me... I will bake for you. Few things here, I am not a fan of the MainEventMafia but that's not a shock, but seeing someone other then Mick Foley with the belt, that's another cookie. Second, Kurt Angle did you forget to look in the mirror before you came to the ring? You have some smudges on your...wait you are growing a beard. Please don't. You look creepy. You know me I love a good heel turn, even better when I get blind sided by it. (I have got to start getting ppvs somehow)

Jeff Jarrett calling in his promo.... literally. I thought it sounded more like a spot for the video game then an actual phone call... hmmmm.

Nash vs Abyss. Cool. That's new. The run in by Stevie Richards was over the top. A taser gun? Really? Not needed really not needed. Nash won. (boo)

Beer Money Inc. the new Tag Team champs again. Nice. Storm just went up 5 points with me for his little bottle speech.... hehehe.
Does Booker T. make this dren up as he goes or does he just mem-or-ize- he's li-nes like he is playing on-Star-Tr-ek ? (that was a William Shatner impression for those who can't read)
Roode vs Steiner....it was nice to hear the crowd backing Roode. Finally someone who proves the Steiner Recliner is not the hard move it has been made out to be. Steiner won.
Booker T. vs Storm...I am deaf and do not have subtitles what was the crowd saying.... it was a DQ. Giving Storm the win (yay)

If I have to hear the word Tweak out of Foley's mouth one more time.....

Eric Young slapped Rhino.... do it again!

AJ Styles calling Joe out...bored now. Matt Morgan doing a running save for Joe. Nice. Daniels running out to save Styles also nice.

And the MotorcityMachine Guns!.... where the hell were they this week? Infact where were the X-Division matches?

Glitches

Sorry if you have the blog set for email notices.... this week's post for my TNA thoughts got sent out not finished. Blogger is having issues with the scheduling/drafts buttons.

I'm still working on this week's TNA post.....

Impacting the Mat part 2

Hey now.... myself and the Drummer have started up the blog. So far, it's just the bare bones of the blog with an intro but check it out, and then stay tuned to it for hopefully alot of noise and triple threat matches.

It's called Blind Tag Blog

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Impacting the Mat

It's no surprise my weekly "My Thoughts on TNA Impact" are my most popular stuff (next to my relationship posts) and I am starting to get a few people sending me comments/questions/insults on my reasons for not covering wwe on my blog.

Well, I have decided to consider it... just not here.
I and my crack team *clears throat* of reporters *clears throat* (translation= my friends whom I am pestering to help) very well might be launching another blog that will cover both companies and maybe a few indies as well.

I will still be doing my TNA stuff on this one as well, cause you know my #1 fan is in Detroit and I can't let him down. (P.S. I am not delusional. )

Let Me Behead You

The heat is way too much for me.
I am not happy.
It's been a long week of one crappy thing after another.
I hate the world right now.
If I had Slayer powers alot of people would have been staked by now.
The planets are out of whack and wrecking havoc with my mind.
The heat is way too much for me.
Waite, I said that already. Saying it again.
Freal the world!
That means you right now.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

What the Freal!!! Blog shares kiss my ARSE!

I just found out I have been added to some blogshare bullshit!
Some dick head claiming I am his blog. Dude Freal yourself!

I DO NOT support that site! Nor do I want to be part of it.



EDIT***** I had to add their frealing code to prove my blog is mine! Freal you all!

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Are there any single straight men left on this planet? part 6

I am back asking this question.
Why am I asking this question? Well, because the well has dried up. Yeah. Not one single note, nod, or wink since last week. I think this city is very much out of available men. Starting to think that all of Canada is too.
Okay, let's import them from the U. S. now... say maybe Detroit?

Anyway, I have a killer little black dress, have not been to the art gallery in 4 years and have no one to go with. I thought the point of dating was to you know date someone, not sit around the house checking emails and waiting.
Oh wait, now I remember, we used to do that but with a phone instead of emails right.

Seriously, I have to find a way to brake out of this rut.
I need a man! And I am getting impatient waiting.

What's that rule though... right only date men who want to date/like you.
Damn it janet! I am out of luck again. Unless of course my number one fan wants to be a hunky hero and sweep me off my feet. Come on, I know you want to.

Ask Ardeth

Time to dig into the fang mail for another batch of emails from beyond the grave.
Welcome to an overdue issue of "Ask Ardeth" Where anything that can be thought of to ask will be answered by my horror film Heavy Metal Goddess alter ego Ardeth Blood.


Dear Ardeth:

I love that you do your weekly "Thoughts on TNA" but I want to know why you never mention the Knock-Outs ? You talk about the X-Division all the time but never the Knock-Outs.

Signed an Angelina Love fan in Hamilton.


Dear Angelina Love fan :

I have never been a fan of women wrestling.



Dear Ardeth:

Why is it you have such a plan looking blog on Alucard's Rose. It doesn't have any blood or bats or any music playing on it. You should add some more gothic stuff to it, and change the colour to black or deep red. Why is it pink. It's not a very goth blog for vampires.

From The Dark One in Brandon Manitoba


Dear Dark One:

I am not a goth contrary to popular belief. I did not want my vampire blog to be the same old thing everyone else was doing. I do not feel the need to have a lot of extra dren cluttering it up. It is a news style blog, and therefore is fine the way it is. I picked pink because the title is Alucard's Rose, it fits with the mood I was trying to create.




That's all the time we have for this one, come back around and see what other gobs of wisdom Ardeth Blood will dish out and serve to her fiends.

You can email Ask Ardeth at hardcorevampsprods@yahoo.ca

What? I 'm Listening Honest


Someone told me this would make a nice Author's photo for the inside of a novel.
I think it was their way of trying to get a fire under my ass to finish the latest draft of my latest book.

Granted it would be not too horrible, but if things actually made it to a printers, I would have a more stylish photo.

Besides being rejected by Harlequin few years ago (okay ten years ago but who's counting eh?) kinda snaps the lid shut on things.
Harlequin is the only game in the romance novel industry. If they hate you ; you're toast. But that was a decade ago, and my writing abilities have improved.
Though you might not know that on this thing as of late.

So I have set a new deadline. Of which I seem to do alot lately. A new deadline of Oct. 31 2009 -and by posting it here I really set it in stone- to have my latest draft of my latest novel done.

Right, now back to your regular scheduled blog

Monday, June 22, 2009

More Ranting from the Kid's Table

I wanted to call it more bitching and ranting from the dating scene but...
Anyways, guys pay attention!!!

*If you graduated more then 5 years ago DO NOT add a photo of yourself at grad. Just because you looked good in that suit does not mean you still look that way. Trust me it's false advertising.

*DO NOT have five hundred photos of you fishing. Particularly if you are holding the damned fish over your face. It's not sexy, it's not cute. And I am sick of seeing fishermen.

*DO NOT use a photo of a sports hero no matter how small his fan base is. Unless you are indeed that sports hero (then why would you be needing a dating site?)

*DO NOT message a woman if she has guidelines and you don't fit them then get snarky when she tells you she's not interested. If I say I am looking for a man 26-34 it means I am looking for a man 26-34 NOT a man in his 40's or 50's.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Why Do Men Do That Eh?

The dating site, wondering just how bad of an idea it really is.
Why do men say that they are looking for "serious relationships" and "anyone within Canada" if they are only circling the limited few in their city?
It's cause boys you need to admit you are not looking for anything serious. If the nedan isn't within your backyard your too damn lazy to work for it. 90% of the guys I have talked to on that site are wanting to get together right off so they can get off right away.
Have any of you lot thought that maybe your "perfect ideal" is outside of your city limits and that is why you have not found her? Has that thought crossed your minds at all?
This is why so many out there using these sites are bitter and jaded and don't stay at them if they only get one or two replies and don't find someone "perfect" within a week.

I have been on the internet long enough in the last few years and have met some great guys from England, United States and outer areas of Canada. You just have to be willing to put an honest effort into things. If you are only looking for "the easy" you are going to keep finding dren.
Wasn't the whole point of the internet being invented to bring people together?

Saturday, June 20, 2009

And Maybe It's Just A Backstreet Boys' Kind Of Day

Yes you read it right.
It's one of those days were nothing seems to be fitting right and all I want to do is listen to a BSB cd. Just escape reality for awhile and let it wash over me in a soothing vibration of boybandness.
Not trying to unlock my writer's block, not trying to understand anything today, just trying to turn off the chatter in my head. Zone out on a soft song.
Better then Yoga sometimes. Sometimes not.
I actually have the song Unmistakable from their cd Unbreakable stuck in my head. So I decided to put it on replay for a bit and just let it roll on and on.
I am not afraid to say it, I like boybands. Well some of them.
Back a decade ago, Ninja, Setla, Viva-Loco Homegirl Esq. and myself went to see 98', O-Town, Wave, and N'Sync. It was cool. Interesting actually, if I had been blogging at that point in my life the blog would have been alot more interesting, filled with more friends and their antics.
Now, all you get is me. Me and my obessessions.
And by now you all know who/what my favourite obessession is.
I think I will dash out for one of my other favourite obessessions, starbucks.

Friday, June 19, 2009

I promised a rant about Alex Shelley

Dear Alex Shelley:

Even though you are the sexiest man alive, and Dionysus in human form, you are Anorexic looking. Now I understand you have to weigh a certain amount for your division, but you no longer have a butt.
Looking back on footage of you from two years ago, you look better in some of that footage.
Now you also look like you have no waist at all.

You are starting to look hollow faced and to the point where your veins on your arms are showing. We should not be seeing the veins on your arms that vividly even with zoom lens.
We get it, you are into that punk movement, that doesn't mean you have to end up looking like Sid Vicious from the Sex Pistols did.

Please, eat something!

My Thoughts on TNA Impact for June 18 2009


Yay! seems someone at iTunes Canada has heard me bitching about it never being on time as of late, this is two weeks in a row it's been ready for download the next morning.
I used screen captures again for this post

Right off, the "party" theme was lame. Stop it. Stop it. Stop it now. Are you guys just searching for something of an identity for Foley right now? Cause you are really coming up short. I know he's trying to be funny but it's coming off badly. Oh hang on, is that his gimmick? The uncool dad who tries too hard? Still lame.

SSSSHHHHHHH! Raven is talking now. Can we have Raven do commentary. Please. Please. begging here. Please. Having him in a Clockwork Orange House of Fun match against Holliday was brilliant. Pure genuis. Classic Raven as he slammed Holliday into the guardrail. And Holliday throwing himself over the ropes into the cage and onto the floor...nice move. Can we have two hours of Raven? Please. Begging here. Raven won with a falls count anywhere pinning on the floor. Serious a full show of just Raven. Doing everything from commentary to wrestling, to promos to....

To the editors who make up the little flashbacks. You get a cookie. The flashbacks are clean, quick and to the point. (In under 30 seconds or less or it's free. )

Daniels vs Amazing Red. Nice too see the X-Division being mixed up a little. Loved the corkscrew dive Red pulled off. The Huricanrada(someone with a wrestling dictionary want to message me with the proper spelling) in the middle of the ring from a leap off the top rope was well amazing. Daniels won. Surprised me actually, I thought this was going to be Red's match.

Make Up! What the hell are you doing? Blue eyeshadow....oh my god! No! Just throw out the blue eyeshadow. Just throw it out.
Matt Morgan .... sorry I feel asleep was he talking again.

Something that has always bothered me, doing half a promo like the camera is not there, and then suddenly turning to look directly in the camera. I get that it's to direct the point of the promo, to let the watchers know you know it's a promo, but sometimes the timing of the direct look is off beat and it doesn't work.

Isn't time to get rid of Abyss' mask? Can we have Abyss de-masked?

MotorCityMachine Guns! with Lethal and Creed ... I love it. Did anyone else catch Shelley sniffing that chick's hair? I was laughing so hard I even forgot to drool. Alex Shelley had the line of the night with a simple "Jay Stop It."
Sabin, Shelley that hand gesture, sorry boys but what are you five? It always puts me in mind of my nephew when he's trying to get my attention. I see you are still wearing the Kiss concert pants. Okay so this was a three way tag match with MotorCityMachine Guns!/Team 3D/Lethal and Creed. Suicide running into the match...hmm. Either Shelley is a better actor then people give him credit for or else he landed wrong. Not sure. And then he lost to Devon. (not happy)


Lethal the moomoo has to go.

You are on my mind Get out of it

There is this guy who I went to grade school with. Heath Park School. I know he's a year younger then me because we were in split level classes together.
I see him around all the time. I had such a crush on him in grade school.
Here's the thing. He's not my type now. Not at all physically .
Spotted him last night at the wrestling event, he's always at the wrestling events I think it's the only thing he and I ever had in common in school.
He's never alone. I don't know if he's married or even straight for that matter cause he's always with a bunch of guys and a groups of kids. So I think he has kids.
I have seen him at the grocery a million times, once again always with some other dude and a few kids. Which brings me back to I am not sure he's straight. I could be off on that, I have never been able to gage that too well with men.
So why is he on my mind? Whenever I see him; he always seems to be walking past me five hundred times for no reason. Like he's circling the building.
Now us women we do this when we are trying to get a man's attention. We will get up and walk with no destination or reason infront of the man five hundred times hoping to catch the man's eye or at very lest have him see our figures.
Okay Mr. Heath Park School. Mr. Wrestlemaina. If you bump into me some time when out about town maybe say hi. Just wanna know if I am totally lost my mind or what?

Are there any single straight men left on this planet? part 5

So after the bad wrestling I caught up with The Drummer. We spent about an hour over coffee, this was after I got the hairy eyeball from his buddies during the wrestling.
It wasn't too bad actually. We talked...well I talked and he nodded sipping his coffee. Hey, this date lasted longer then the one with Chef and Italian combined but Freud has everyone beat time wise.
Whenever I can yammer on about TNA with a captive audience then bonus points get handed out.
So, the last big date before being Hermit Girl again was vaguely rocking. In a quiet winding down after a loud event sort of way.
Not only did he pay for the said coffee, he was nice enough to drive me home. There are a few nice guys left on this planet. Poor guy though, The Drummer looked like he was going to fall face first into his paper cup at one point when I started in on Star Trek.

And The Legends Supershow


Wasn't all that super a show.
There were 5 matches. Only 5.
*The Hunks (possibly the Hollywood Hunks I couldn't hear the announcer. ) vs the Highlanders. The Highlanders won by a very quick 3 count.
* The Genius vs Barber Beefcake. The Genius won which caused Beefcake to then manhandle the ref and shave the Ref's head.
*Koko B.Ware vs someone who's name I didn't catch but was wearing a red Pimp outfit. Koko won I think. There were too many people standing infront of me I couldn't tell.
*Abdula the Butcher vs someone else I didn't catch. This was a hardcore match that never made it into the ring at all and ended up a Double DQ outside in the lobby.
*Psycho Sid Vicious vs Hacksaw . Hacksaw won by a very quick 3 count.

The ring was not even a wrestling ring as much as a loose boxing ring, and when I say loose, I mean it had the bounciest ropes I have ever seen.
More time was spent with them doing autograph signings then anything else, not that I could really see anything as everyone and their dog's grandmother was standing infront of me. Nor could I hear anything over the screaming crowd. And when I say screaming I mean everyone saying "HOOOOOO".

I can't get over how bad this event was. I have been to alot of live wrestling events over the decades, and this was by far the worst. It was short 2 matches, and the so called hardcore match was less then 5 mintues on account they left the arena.
It was also so dark in there even with a flash almost none of my photos turned out. So not happy at all.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Just because I don't talk about TNA Impact enough

Everyone has a hobby, finding reasons to blog about TNA Impact is mine. Okay it's my sick obsession and I really need a new thing to do but not today. Today we blog!
Let me set the mood for you, I am sitting here listening to Alice Cooper's Along Came A Spider thinking about tonight's local wrestling event (the Legend's SuperShow ) getting all hyper wishing it were a TNA event. Deep sigh maybe someday. It was urber cool back in 2006 when Jeff Jarrett and Robert Roode came to town. I have a photo of Jarrett's butt where he stood infront of me, yes had he taken half a step backward he would have landed in my lap.
Anyway, let's blog shall we. This way my pets down the crypt stairs and over to the corner of the library where the large book of knowledgeness sits. Open it to page 666 chapter 6 verse 6 .... well this is my blog post what did you expect entering a six sided ring from stage left with pyro and an enterence song? No no no, we're going Crypt Keeper for this...

What we blogging about?

Let's blog about the top guys in the X-Division. Cause you know I don't chatter about them enough already, and they don't find me creepy enough yet.


Aww they don't find you creepy. They don't know you exist. They would have to know you are on the planet to find you creepy.


Well who I would like to see get the X-Division belt next ... you know if Petey Williams was still there I would be saying him. Did I shock you? You thought I was going to say Alex Shelley didn't you? Well, actually I really really would like to see the Tag Team belts on the MotorCityMachine Guns! So I guess my next vote for X-Division belt holder would be Eric Young. More over, I just really hate the Suicide gimmick. Just get that mask off him and make him go away. The gimmick was cool for like a month back last fall to promote the video game, but it's so dead and over. I would like to see Jay Lethal drop the Macho Man gimmick too. Find something else. Or you know, at lest stop wearing the streamers that are on your clothes. I don't know, about the rest of the wrestling fans on the planet, but I was drawn to TNA for the newness of it, not for tired old recycled gimmicks. Maybe because I lived through that whole 80's thing I find it well cobwebby and not in a good way either.
Oh question do we have an X-Division Tag Team belts? That would be cool to have wouldn't it?
And of course I am raising the torch again with my crazy idea that Chris Sabin needs to cut his hair and shave. Why? Now now, we have been over this a million times, he looks like a dirty bucket. A sexy dirty bucket, but a dirty bucket none the less.

You need to give Chris Sabin's hair it's one tag label.

Na! That would take all the fun out of it. Besides that would mean his hair is more important then him.

Okay to recap :
*Let's give the X-Division belt to Eric Young for a while
*Let's give the Tag Team belts to the MotorCityMachine Guns!
*Let's get rid of the bad gimmicks
*Let's add (if you haven't by the time of this post) an X-Division Tag Team belts.


Okay my pets the sun is coming up, and I don't share my Count Chocula with anyone. So close the windows on your way out of the crypt.


Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Are there any single straight men left on this planet? part 4

Yeah like clockwork the guys stopped chatting. They stopped calling too. I was only shinny and new for a few days then the new car smell wore off.
Deep sigh
Oh well. I knew it couldn't last forever. I am just not that type. I am not anyone's type so it would seem.
So much for Freud. He said he'd call me yesterday. Well yesterday came and went and nothing. See I really do pick the wrong guys. But hey, what was it I was expecting from a hot young twentysomething anyway?

Well if this was a chick flick or a romance novel then there would be a hunky hero waiting to sweep me off my feet. Hmmm let's see; what kind of situation would we like to put me in to meet this hunky hero?

It's a rainy afternoon and your heroine is hanging out in the book store. Dressed like she just walked out of an episode of Sex and the City. (Maybe something like what Carrie wore in Cock-A-Doddle-Do which was episode 48 season 4) the patterned jeans with the pink shirt. And while balancing a very heavy stack of books and magazines, spot the most beautiful man ever. At this point of course the books would fall. The hunky hero would be dressed in dark jeans and a grey tee that clung to his body. He would have chocolate brown eyes and pale skin, short dark hair and perfectly shaped lips. (yummy) He would lean over and pick up the dropped books handing them back with a weak smile. Then of course the hunky hero would be standing a few people behind our heroine in the line up to pay for the books. Maybe we over hear a few teenaged girls gooing and ohhing over the hunky hero. Then just as our heroine has finished paying for her books/magazines the hunky hero slids up beside her, asking her to join him for a coffee. They chat, they laugh, they fall in love over bad lattes and their mutual love of words. We then find out the hunky hero is a photographer/painter and he's actually read all of our heroine's blogs/articles for the last few years and has been crushing on her all this time without knowing who she was. Did I mention he's eight or nine years younger then her.
Or they could meet in an art gallery, infront of a large painting the hunky hero pointing out the faults with the piece leaning over her shoulder a drink in hand, then introduce himself only to be the artist. And have him ask her to model for him sometime.

Yeah, that's my dream way of being swept off my feet. Another deep sigh. It could happen. You never know.

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Question: What do men mean when...?

I keep hearing men say they are looking for a "good woman" okay guys if you want to explain this one to me do so cause I am falling down clueless here.
I asked my buddies and they just raised eyebrows and shrugged.
I asked my married friends and they just raised eyebrows and shrugged then referred to their wives little habits and quirks. Of which were all very different little habits and quirks.
So, if you stumble on this post please feel free to comment with a reply.

So Mom had a doctor's appointment

I hate talking about serious stuff.
But no one is dealing with this so I need to vent.

Mom's been going back and forth for the last few months to the doctor's because they found a few lumps in her left breast.
So far it's all been negative. But she won't talk about it, my sister won't talk about it. And that's not going to make it just disappear. Yes so far it's been okay but that does not change that it's still something to be dealing with.

I have never had a very good family life, it was always strained at the best of times. But this is something I'm alittle freaked over.

Tuesday

It's so easy to slip back into old routines.
This last week was a wave of craziness, and now silence.

The big news for today is that I keep breaking my nails when I type.
The wrestling event is on Thursday night. I am already trying to figure out what to wear. Yeah that's just me. I have a coffee situation after the wrestling. The last of the big dates and then I go back into hermit mode. Well can't say it was not fun while it lasted. It was fun. Scary and fun.
Maybe in 20 years I'll have another round of dates who knows.
That's pathetic isn't it? Well, I've known full well that I wasn't going to find any guy in this city that was long term relationship material. As every guy in this city has already been with everyone else in this city and everyone is either related or the ex of a friend.

I got spoiled at one point I think. I got used to hanging out in high school and college with Gerry and Steve, got used to the artistic stuff, then when Dargo came into my life I got used to having someone around who not only was creative he was Mr. Occult.
So what I am looking for is a guy who is the perfect blend of that. Someone who is such an Addams. So I guess the check list would go like this...
*must be an artist
*must be into the Occult
*must be into wrestling
*must like coffee
*must like reading
*must like vampires/zombies/werewolves
*must have a great sense of humour

So if I ever find this perfect Gomez you'll hear about it. Til then, back to your regularly scheduled blog.

Monday, June 15, 2009

At what point do we become Pop-Culture Icons?

I have asked myself this question so often that not just my brain hurts but my hair does too.
The rules for being a pop-cultural icon have changed in the last 10 years with the internet, cell phones, and podcasts. So what makes one iconic?

With terms like Paparazzi, Glitterati, Internet Famous, Reality Tv Stars and Society Idols, when and where does one actually cross over into Fandom?

Back in the day one had to weld a powerful sword of words, wit and wisdom to be considered a relevant personality. Beauty helped. Money too. In the end it was talent and the circle you kept. Now, it's change just slightly. Now it's the circle you keep, your money beauty with no talent needed. Just a video phone and a youtube account.

What do you do when your Vogue idea is to be in Vogue?

When is it Love ?

What is love?

Lust has been easy to define, hate has been too, but love is that strange thing in between that has never been able to be defined.

The Oxford Canadian Dictionary defines Lust : strong sexual desire, a passionate desire for, having a strong or excessive desire.
The Oxford Canadian Thesaurus gives alternates for Lust: sexual desire, sexual appetite, sexual longing, ardour, desire, passion, libido, sex drive, sexuality, biological urge, lechery, lasciviousness, concupiscence, horniness, the hots, randiness, and Lustful as immodest, wanton, impure, dirty, prurient, erotic, passionate.

So then what is love?
And why is it what we all are looking for? Is that the reason we go in search of "love" because it is so undefinable? Or is there something more to it?

The Oxford Canadian Dictionary defines Love : sexual desire, sexual passion, intense feelings of deep affection, like very much
The Oxford Canadian Dictionary gives alternates for Love: doting, worship, yearning, delight, lust, passion, desire, ardour, idolize, infatuated, captivated by, have a taste for.

Less ways to describe the bigger of the two. Does this mean that it's not really love we are truly insearch for but infact lust?
Have we been unable to find the fairy tale because we are chasing the wrong dreams?
When we say "I Love You" should we really be saying "I am in Lust with you"?

If the only difference between in love and in lust is a few degrees then it's no wonder so many people get hurt. It's no wonder so many people end up with mixed messages and bad break ups. We were thinking we'd found the love of our life when maybe all we found was the lust of the moment.

When is it love?

Ask Ardeth


Time to dig into the fang mail for another batch of emails from beyond the grave.
Welcome to an overdue issue of "Ask Ardeth" Where anything that can be thought of to ask will be answered by my horror film Heavy Metal Goddess alter ego Ardeth Blood.



Dear Ardeth:

You list yourself as being proud to be on the D-List in the Blogosphere. What on earth would make you do such a thing and why are you not trying to raise your status? You are not making any money at this nor are you getting any real fame so why do you keep at it? And why are you proud to be such a looser?

Signed Celebrity Chaser in Selkirk Manitoba


Dear Celebrity Chaser in Selkirk:

If you are so put off by my low end status why are you still reading me and following my life?
I must be of interest to you if you feel the need to point out my D-List ability.
Not everything is about money. Not everything is about fame.
My status may change it may not, but you will always be an asshole.



That's all the time we have for this one, come back around and see what other gobs of wisdom Ardeth Blood will dish out and serve to her fiends.

You can email Ask Ardeth at hardcorevampsprods@yahoo.ca

TNA on Twitter

I follow alot of people on Myspace, Facebook and Twitter.
But I think I have more stuff connected to TNA on Twitter then anything else, from the Sabin fan site, to the Underground wrestling news, to the official TNA Online and now Jeremy Borash.

This was kind of cool and you know programmed. I woke up this morning to see a direct message on Twitter from Jeremy Borash. It was a standard welcome note.

Hey thanks man.

I can only say one thing, the dude must never read my blog. Yeah I am laughing like a lunatic right now on that thought.
Yes I have thoughts this early in the day. Usually ones that would lead to blushing wildly if anyone was around cause you know can't keep my mind out of the gutter when it comes to the wrestlers at TNA.

I am tempted to send a direct message back with the blog link. Maybe then if someone over there was reading my blog maybe just maybe they would do something about Chris Sabin's hair.

Sunday, June 14, 2009

What would Jane Do? Or I dug my own grave

So around 10pm last night I started to chat it up with Freud.
We met up around 1am.

Now you know me, you know I am looking for a long term solution to my lack of a romantic situation, so why did I let myself be kinoodled like a swordfish on a harpoon? Because my pets if you travel back through the posts of this messy life you will very much remember that StandUpGuy was the last man standing.
So what does this mean for your heroine? Less stress for a few days but a whack of issues as wait for it, Freud looks like a younger version of Dargo.
Yeah. Talk about me having issues. I guess I will never get over the past if I keep trying to relive it.

So what would Jane Austen do in a situation where a second Mr. Knightley arrived? Most likely pawn them off on Miss Bates.
Oh wait I am the Miss Bates of this story. Damn, hand me a shovel and give me til sunup.

Saturday, June 13, 2009

Meanwhile in a Bedroom across town...

Okay this is too weird. Not only has hell frozen over and the Hellmouth has opened up, but I have had more guys contact me in the last 72 hours then I have in 35 years.
It's unnatural and just not humanly possible.
Men are on average disgusted by me. They run away in the other direction puking on their shoes. They don't ask me out for drinks.
What's going on here? Am I about to die or something? Is there going to be a big explosion that is going to wipe out the human race in the next few days?
I don't understand how this is happening?
Oh my frealing god. You mean I might actually being getting what I want? No wait what I want is a former X-Division champ, and I don't see that being wrapped up in a bow for me and being left on my doorstep.
So what's going on here? I just had some very young man offer himself to me. Damn! I have a baseline age and he's just a few years shy of it.
He was hotter then hell in a bathtub! And you know what I did?
Nothing.
I turned him down.
Yes I am a crazy person.
A very hot, very funny, young man who lives only 4 blocks from me offered to run right over and spend the night and I said no. I need to have my head examined. Oh wait, he was doing that too. Did I forget to mention he's going for his degree in Psychology?
Well, Freud if you still want to chat about it, call me up sometime.

Here's the big nasty of it. I kept thinking if this was just Cole Cash. Yeah, what's going on here? Freud is only a mire 3 years younger then Cash and my mind was drifting to ....well I am a crazy person for turning down a sure thing.

Shoot me. Stuff me. Mount me.

Are there any single straight men left on this planet? part 3

Ugh!
I just got back from a drink date the Italian (I am not even going to try to give him a cool name) and it went bad from the first second.
He was a good decade older then he said, did not look like his photo and was pushy. He kept looking at his cell phone and the waitresses. Seriously, I was sitting there thinking that Codey Deaner would have been more interesting.
He did pay for my drink so that is okay.

I even had time to stop off at Starbucks on the way home.
Again I stress why I don't date Thunder Bay men. Somebody please send in someone fresh from somewhere else for me. Please!

The Top Ten Reasons I Love TNA Impact


I used the screen captures again for this post.




10- The Ring. Six sided and something that creates a unique show. Not just the look of the ring, but what the wrestlers can do to utilize it.

9- Eric Young. He's brilliant, talented, and the only one I have seen who has been able to play out any theme given. From shy and innocent to baddest of the bad asses.


8- The Tag Team Division. I have always been a fan of tag teams, and this is the first time in close to 20 years where I have seen more then just one good tag team. And the fact they are promoting this is news worthy
.

7- The Broadcast Team. Humour is always something that is needed to get through the dull and overly routine that is interviewing the same few people every day. The Impact Reporters are not afraid to get dirty.


6-The return of Raven. A legend.


5- The wrestling. Do I have to go into detail on this? I love the fact they actually still wrestle and not just over flow with chatter and chairs. The gimmicks are kept to a low and the value is high.

4- Beer Money Inc. This was a gimmick I did not think would last one week but glad to see I was proved wrong. They are a solid force in the Tag Team Division and it's always good to see Roode on air.

3- The X-Division. I used to love watching the smaller guys fly around on other shows years ago, and the X-Division is that and more. There is just something about watching a match where the wrestlers are skilled, quick, and solid. I still count the first match on the first episode of Impact between Sabin/Shelley/Williams as my favourite Impact match.

2- The Turkey Bowl. Admit it, you love that idea. And it lets you in on the secret of who is going to be pushed in the coming year into the spotlight. So lets see who is next for the X-Division belt.

1-MotorCityMachine Guns! The most talented tag team right now, infact I have not seen such a fluid team in about 20 years on tv. Both Alex Shelley and Chris Sabin were fabulous as single wrestlers and together they are magic. The two hottest thing in a ring and the two sexiest men alive. I loved their promos few years ago when they were up against Backland, and what Shelley did in the comdey promos with Nash and the other X-Division members. Smart, funny, talented, sexy. Now if we could just do something about Sabin's hair.

Friday, June 12, 2009

My Thoughts on TNA Impact for June 11 2009 (the bad 80's flashback edition)



Mick Foley calling out Jeff Jarrett....okay right off, what's going on there with the shirts? Are we having a bad 80's hair metal flashback? We're superstars bow down and worship our clothes. Dude, Jarrett, that shirt has way too much going on. You could have at lest sent it through the washer a few times to get the gloss off it. And the Three Stooges gimmick...would have been funnier if he'd done Abbott and Costello. The office rant had me....bored now.

Raven sitting there just being during the Team 3D promo. I squealed like a 12 year old at a Boyband concert. Yeah he's that cool. And then sitting there again later while MainEventMafia bled....It's Raven as Joe's phantom right? Please? And him just sitting there out side the women's toilet while the beat down happened.... yes I am giggling like a mad child over the very fact of Raven. He says so much just by staring off camera, his leather jacket looking.... sorry drooling again.

Booker T...pick a vocal gimmick and stick with it. One second you're on a bunch of fake accents the next your a rap video. And what was with that little spin in the locker room? Where your tights to snug?
The handicapped First Blood match between Steiner/Booker vs Samoa Joe was kind of interesting. Steiner was sliced and diced first and lost to Joe. Booker went down making Joe the winner of the match.

Shane Douglas having a match vs A.J. Styles was an impressive showing for Douglas. Styles having been semi-grounded near the beginning of the match added to the usefulness. I was alittle surprised to see Styles get the pin though.
And Daniels doing a run in save before the five minute beat down mark was a nice touch. Joe coming in to save Daniels, now that I did not see coming. (you get a cookie) And Daniels promo was just a bit too close up. Stand away from the camera man, you are scaring him.

Has anyone ever counted up how many times JB has had a door slammed in his face? I am betting it's up in the hundreds by now? Someone in editing could you count and get back to me...
And who the freal is doing the make up on everyone? What did you all go to a Poison concert or something to learn your make up skills? Dude, tone it down they look like clowns, and not in a good ICP kind of way either.

Eric Young slapping JB... do it again! JB went down like a girl.

Kurt Angle vs Sting was typical. I just can't get hyper about these guys. Matt Morgan running out for a moment led to Angle going on to the King of the Mountain match.


MotorCityMachine Guns! teaming once again with Creed and Lethal, this round being Lethal and Shelley to go against Team 3D had me wondering first off what the hell is going on with those bangs? I mean it Alex Shelley are you reading my blog, have you not realized how bad your tag team partner's hair is and now you start with the abuse of hair gel... And what was with that moomoo Lethal came out in? Nice flip by Brother Ray on Lethal. Shelley running in with a low blow, dude you couldn't think of anything more dynamic? And what is up with that outfit? Did you just come from a Kiss concert or some dren? But Shelley did get the pin over Devon so that's a good thing. You know what, I have never complained about Alex Shelley (he is the sexiest man alive and a total god. Dionysus in human form) but you know it's coming, there will be a rant.

4 cups past Midnight

Actually, it's not yet one cup at 7:30a.m.

I spent a good part of last night talking to Indie Wrestler Cole Cash. I did I did. Trying to line up a few other interviews with a few other wrestlers. Here's hoping.

I am very tired. But up at this hour none the less, waiting for iTunes or Spike tv or some slotch on youtube to have last night's Impact up. Not having cable sucks. But to pay $55 a month for cable for one tv show would suck even more.

Heading out in a while to get me a ticket for next week's event. Double thanks to the dude who passed me the info on it coming to town. So we will see what's up with that.

Yeah, I am yammering on this morning aren't I? I am barely in zombie mode today. And mom wants to go to the mall. Whoo-and a Hoo.

And.... I can't get the song "Gothic Chick" by Twiztid out of my head last few days. It's just there, stuck in between the cobwebs and the goat cheese hanging out where even Freddy Krueger won't dare to tread. And I am not sure why? Why oh great Cthulhu are you leaving little crumbs like that in my mind?

This just might be a 4 Starbucks kind of day.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Are there any single straight men left on this planet? Part 2

Mark this on your calender, cause Hell froze over today and the Apocalypse is coming!

Why am I screaming about the end of the world well my pets, I had a date. Yes a date. An no I am not referring to a fig or prune either. Though that would make more sense for me wouldn't it.

So this is a What I learned from Sex and the City post ,sort of.
In the very first episode of the series (Sex and the City) the question of the week is "Why are there so many great unmarried women and no great unmarried men?" Well it seems they are a few nice ones anyway.

I just got back from coffee with the Chef. He was very nice. Almost too nice. For me anyway.
He was well mannered, (he even paid ) interesting, cute even.
So what was wrong with him you are asking? Nothing. If you are an outdoors girl. He's a hot catch if you love being outside 24/7. Sadly I am better suited to cryptic dust covered rooms then woodland areas. He did ask if I wanted to go for a walk or a movie or coffee again sometime so we'll see.

I mean that's promising right? Means that the men of the world are lowering their standards and realizing that if they want a faithful person they need to look outside their normal.
And it also means I live on the Hellmouth. Cause if I can get a date anyone can. Right? Right.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Is he safe to date?

I just got asked out for drinks for the weekend. Nice.
I just have to double check with my sister to make sure he's not one of her ex's. Cause that would be messy if he is.
That's pretty bad. When I have to run my social life by my younger sister for permission.

The ceiling gods are laughing at me aren't they?
The Great Cthulhu might have to eat him slowly because he would be cruncher then burnt Tofu. That is if he is.

No he does not look anything like Chris Sabin or Alex Shelley. That would be too much to have hoped for.

Oh it gets worse

Sinister even.
Dargo is on that dating site. Stupid frealing bucket of dren.
What the hell is going on? I am cursed right?
My past is doomed to haunt me forever isn't it?

All I want is a nice guy, maybe you know a boy from Detroit, who looks like he could be an X-Division champ or something, who likes art and is really funny. So why the freal am I haunted by this man?

This is two days this week that he popped up out of nowhere, and not even trying to talk to me. What's going on?
How many buckets of blood do I need to share before I get some nice happy?

And I do this why...continued Or This should tell me something shouldn't it?

So, my buddy whom I have been friends with for almost 20 years, told me about how he met his girlfriend back in the fall on a new dating site.
I decided last night to check it out. I have done all the dating sites I think around in the last 5 years and I seem to find myself checking out the same six or seven profiles out on all them.
Anyway, getting to the point of things, the more I seem to search the less I am interested.
Hang on it's gets funny.

Everyone and their dog's grandmother knows I have a thing for Chris Sabin. They know this because I can't shut my mouth about him. A friend of mine who I have yammered on about before, was a while ago telling me how he thought we'd be an "interesting match" (long boring story leave it at that)
Celebrity crush aside, as I surfed through the photos and profiles of the guys realizing I am not compatible or interested in 90% of them, I could think of nothing but an episode of Impact from a few years ago that contained wrestler Chris Sabin. And what it was that got the crush for him started.
It was a promo/sketch they did back over 2 years ago, where he jumped out of a tree and did a double take to the camera. It was the look on his face of a half blank stare half trying to hide a wicked laugh that got my blood racing. And that is what I really like about him.
What I realized gets me more then looks every time is a goofball.
So where am I going with this and when does the funny kick in you are asking?
I was searching through the masses of unwanted men, when a photo grabbed my attention. The guy had used a cropped photo of Chris Sabin.
Yeah, smooth eh?
Thinking not enough people on the planet would know who he is.

When he read my profile and saw I was a fan the dude deleted his profile.
Goes to show you should never pretend to be someone you are not.

And I do this why

I was chatting with my buddy Gerry in Toronto and the topic of my singleness came up. He told me to try this one site. So I did.
And now I remember why I do not date Thunder Bay guys.
Ugh!
They are all the same, they are all moose food (yes I know moose are not into humans but it's funny) they all have monkeypoo's and they all want a woman who is a size two. So not me or what I am looking for.
And the whole time I am chatting with these local retards I could think of 3 things
* I just wanna be chatting with Cole Cash right now
*None of you guys look like Alex Shelley
*None of you guys look like Chris Sabin (Nor were any as funny )
My buddy Gerry who has known me for slinking up 20 years now (damn we are old aren't we) says I am too picky.
Fine I am too picky. Whoo-hoo. Yeah that is me. The too picky girl. Why I am a hermit.
The one kinda cute guy on there was a total player. He had like ten girls he was chatting with at once. So why do I do this and torture myself? Oh right I need a real life and a husband.

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Black Circle Boys


Remember few posts back when I was going on about this movie and having hunted it down on Amazon. http://andrewandthealuminumsidings.blogspot.com/2009/05/amazonca-vs-com.html

Well, it came in today. I just finished watching it.
Dude, I paid $20 bucks for this?
This is based on a true story, and is what the Craft was suppose to have been. I kept waiting for some special effects or something. But it plays like a washed out after school special. Labeled a horror film, the only thing scary about this is Donnie Wahlberg -no wait it gets scarier- as a gay gothic pimp. Told you it got scarier.
It started off what would be a really great career playing creepy guys though for Eric Mabius.
It's about this dude who's brother dies in an accident and then he moves to another city with his parents, and ends up getting caught up in this group of demon worshiping acid dropping addicts. And then one night they go too far killing one of the members.

What I find ironic is that it came out a few months after the whole Rod Ferrell murders happened. (Vampire Clan the 2002 film was about those murders) Is this a connection? No idea, but there are scenes in Black Circle Boys that are very similar to what has been described in that murder case.

If you are a diehard Mabius fan then try to locate this film, otherwise, just stick to Voodoo Moon. In Voodoo Moon he's the hero.

Could it be the world is changing?




On the movie website Cineplex.com they have their 10 Hottest Men List. And the top two kind of shocked me.
Why?
Well, It's not who is on the list in the top two slots but the order of them.
Adrian Brody beat out Johnny Depp for the number one spot.
By no means is this a bad thing. But I am asking is does this mean the world is no longer going for the same old safe route?
Adrian Brody is a talented and very sexy guy by his own right, (did you see him in Last Time I Committed Suicide he makes a sweater and glasses look hotter then anyone since well Johnny Depp did in Secret Window ) For years Depp had the number one spot, it's almost strange to see his name not beside a #1 on any list, but great to see the masses are expanding their taste in eye candy.
Yeah, I know I never claimed to be politically correct on anything.

Monday, June 8, 2009

Can you have a future is your past is present?

This should be a what I learned from Sex and the City post but the quote sums it up better. In episode 77 of season 6 (The Perfect Present) that was the question of the week.

After two years of total silence from Dargo, the big second chance of my life, I see he's updated stuff on his profile on msn. Something I wasn't prepared for. The coward in my couldn't look beyond the fact that it stated his name and an update. I can't handle it.
But this brings up all kinds of issues and thoughts for me. Just when I thought I was safe and comfortable enough to move on with whatever the universe threw at me, I saw this.

That was a football sized curve ball to the skull I didn't see coming. And reacted badly to.
Are we ever truly over our ex's or will they haunt us till we are ghosts ourselves?

Just seeing his name sent me into a tailspin. Which means I am no where near being over him as I thought I was. How do you move on when someone has that much of an effect on you even when they have long since moved on from you?
It's strange how the men in my life have left such a deep impact on me yet I have been nothing but a fly on the windshield of their lives. What is it that leaves so many of us shattered like this?
Are we pre-destined to attach ourselves to the wrong people? Or are we so flawed that it would take more then just duct-tape to patch us back together?

Can you have a future if your past is present?

I must rant about their pants

I had to use the screen capture for this one people. So let me point you to the left of your screen to Lethal and Creed for this rant.

The ripped jeans look that was made so popular back in 1989/1990 by old heavy metal bands like
Def Leppard, Brighton Rock, and almost every other hair band of that time (who doesn't remember the day Andy Curran taught us how to make the ripped look on the Power Hour) should not be making a come back. But for whatever frealed up reason they are.

It was a style we thought was just swell back 20 years ago when I was a teenager, but we also thought that we'd never grow old and believed Ozzy was sober.
How foolish of us.
I get the idea of recycling certain things, but guys come on this look is not one of them. Mistake! Mistake! and in twenty years when you all look back at your photos you will cringe because the ripped jeans look is a Mistake!
It's not a flattering look, it's a bad messy look. It says "I am lazy and don't care if you think I am a bum" And since I lived through this fad once already, I have to ask why are you all doing this now again? Are you having some sort of wannabe flashback?
My Generation tried to relive the hippie era (and wished we hadn't) why would you want to relive the hair metal era?
Listen to the music of your parents but please don't wear the clothes.

Sunday, June 7, 2009

What I learned from Sex and the City part 12

In episode 88 of Sex and the City season 6 (The Ick Factor) the question of the week is "Have we become romance-intolerant?"
As I am watching this episode, where Carrie is being read poetry and having music dedicated to her, and Miranda is planning a frill free wedding for herself; I got to thinking how silly romance really can be.
We watch chick flicks for the sweeping gestures and the desperate passion. We read chick-lit for the hunky heroes who can't live without their heroine. All sugarcoated walks at sunset and pink balloons in the park.
So why then when a guy does something "nice" for us we roll our eyes and say he must be up to something not so honest?
Have we become so jaded that the very idea of a man even knowing what poetry is; is suspect?
I know when I sit and think about all the times my male friends had done something nice for me in the past, it was suspect. In high school I had guys give me tickets to events as a bribe to do their English homework, had them give me art they had made as a bribe to cover for them when they were breaking up with someone, had them give me jewelery as a bribe to go stand inline overnight for concert tickets so they didn't have to, had them dedicate music to me to make other girls jealous... you get the point.

So when did we stop letting the romance be romantic? And why do we still crave it? Maybe it is like a sugar addiction. We need the thought of something sweet to keep us going until we overdose and then crash. And crash we always do.
What would it take in this age of twittering and low-fat-soy lattes for us to believe anything could really be romantic anymore?
My friend Erin's husband still sends her a dozen roses every birthday, holiday, event and sometimes just for the hell of it. She always sighs so dramatically and asks if he can be more original.
My friend Butterfly's husband cooks dinner at lest 2 times a week for them.
My friend the High Priestess' husband is always bringing home exotic Teas and Coffees for her.
Little things, yes but very romantic when you think about it.

Stop rolling your eyes and saying they never do anything for you. At lest you have an honest feeling being put into the gesture.
Some of us have never known what that feels like.

Office Style: The Business Card



In Jane Austen's time, a calling card was left at the door letting you know who had been around looking for you.
In the last 20 years, office employees started being the ones using it. The more stylish the card, the more important the employee.
Now, everyone and their dog's grandmother has a "card" no longer just a business card, but a piece of their identity.
Have we as a society started to return to the basic manners that was daily practice in the time of Miss Austen? Or have we just gotten so egotistical that we need to be more important then we really are?
I don't know but I do like the idea of a card. It has all the information with no chance of misspelling the person's name.

And it seems I am not the only one, as when I hunted on the net for this scene, thinking I would be hunting all day, I found close to 50 youtube entries for it.

The Header Debate


I wanted to freshen up the look of this place, so I started playing around with the header. Bad idea. I had done the piece a few years ago as a painting. Yes, with canvas and real paint. Then made a digital painting of it.
Now, I want something new, but have no idea what. Stupid girl I am, removed the original and tried resizing it. Now, it's alittle too big for the space.
So bare with me over the next while as I try out a few new headers.

We now return to our regularly scheduled blog.

Saturday, June 6, 2009

Canadian Celebrity I would Love to Meet


George Stroumboulopoulos!

Why?

1) He's talented
2)He's hot
3)He's smart
4)He's hot
5)He's interviewed almost everyone and would have great stories
6)He's hot
7)He's funny as hell
8)He's hot
9)He's survived working at all forms of Canadian media
10)He's hot

This is another one of those celebrities that I admire and worship and am not sure I want to be or freal .... No I know I want to freal.... er um...yeah have drinks with.
I have to say I am not the only woman in my family who thinks that he's fabulous. Back few years ago, when he hosted Loud on MuchMusic; it was one show we would agree to watch and all be quiet for. (yeah all of us. Mom, sister, sister's best friends)
Mr. S. I worship your shadow.

What I learned from Sex and the City part 11


In season six episode 83 of Sex and the City (A Woman's Right to Shoes) We are taken down the road of being single and celebrating the idea. Not a new concept for the show, but the most obvious playing out of the theme.
Carrie gets invited to a party of a friend who's now married with kids. While there a very pricey pair of Manolo Blanhniks go missing, and this ends up distressing Carrie (yeah I would be freaking out too). The story then goes on to discuss the idea that being single is never acknowledged in the grand scheme of things.
Well why not?
We as a society are programed to believe that we are nothing without a partner, that when you are less then half a pair you are less then important.
In the end of the episode she gets her pay back by registering for a mock wedding shower.

Many times in the episode she is told by the friend to stop thinking about the missing shoes, and that it is childish for Carrie to be so upset over the issue.
So many times in my life I have been upset over something or needing answers to a situation, and my married friends/the mommies around me laugh and tell me I am being silly. They really hate it when I point out that just a few years ago they would have reacted the same way to the same situation.

I am not saying our priorities don't change when we change our status but why is it that we as single women have to be made feel like a child?
The question of the week is "When did we stop being free to be you and me?"

For all my bitching and ranting about being single and not finding a sensible guy to even consider being with, I have to admit, there are times when I love my freedom. I love the fact I don't have to answer to anyone about where I am going, or why I spent $89 on a sweater, or having to share my tiny bathroom with anyone. I love the fact that if I want to go for coffee at 3am I can without anyone raising an eyebrow wondering where I am sneaking off to. I love the fact that I don't have any little sticky finger prints all over my tv screen, and that I am not tripping over Legos or Tonka trucks.

Here's to being single and fabulous. Happy Single-ness to me.

I want one of...those.

copyright hcvp'09

Yeah I was playing with the screen capture and comic program again. It's the weekend and I have nothing else to do other then the dishes.
I don't know what's more frightening, the fact I am making these thingies or the fact I am getting good at making these thingies. I really really have too much time on my hands. I need a real life and a husband.
I was going to go to the cinema tonight, but the only movie I wanted to see did not come to our city. Why? Because Thunder Bay sucks man. Totally sucks. Blows dog backwards it sucks so much.
I really hate doing the dishes, but since I have no one better to do.....and I already did the laundry.

Friday, June 5, 2009

My Thoughts on TNA Impact for June 4 2009


A hunting we will go a hunting we will go....once again had to hunt it down on the net. Dude, I am getting my shoes dirty doing this.

Strong opening with an X-Division match having Kiyoshi and Bashir teaming up against Daniels and Suicide. Hum. Didn't see that coming maybe it was the mask over my blind eyes; no wait I did see that coming. Way too predictable. Bored now. The round of musical chair run ins was refreshing. Can you feel the sarcasm dripping from me today. Shane Douglas might be what this storyline needs to beef it up. Kiyoshi/Bashir won thanks to Douglas' interference . Yay!

Shane Douglas' promo was not too shabby. But as a Jane Austen fan I would tell you proper etiquette when a gentleman sits down, close your legs.

Kevin Nash coming into the office of Mick Foley and asking him what everyone is thinking "what are you smoking?" had me laughing for a few minutes.
Booker T. having a problem with using full sentences?

Shhhhh! Raven's talking now.
He's still hot. This new look of his has me thinking of the movie Night Breed and the character Peloquin

Eric Young's rant was alittle long but a good start for a heel turn. Do it again.

Matt Morgan still looks like an evil druid in a bad movie with that robe. He went against new comer Jesse Neal. Bored now.

Mick Foley came to the ring to do his promo and I started to think I was watching a Rocky Horror Picture Show party with all the screaming of Boring.

Nash vs Samoa Joe in a LethalLockdown match. I have a theory it maybe bunnies...(sorry Buffy the Vampire Slayer joke) the secret adviser it's Raven right? Please, please be Raven. Joe won which I have to admit I didn't think he would, and will go on now to the King of the Mountain match.

MotorCityMachine Guns! with Creed and Lethal. Well, once again Alex Shelley looked like he was ready to pass out during the promo. Who gave Chris Sabin the script this week? Did he get the promo cause Shelley was sick or something? This time Jay Lethal got the cool line when asking Sabin why he talks so slow. Has a point Sabin sounded like a Kindergarten teacher reading at story time to the kids. Did Lethal need to go to the bathroom or something cause he looked like he was a 5 year old doing the pee dance. Shelley raising his hand saying "no more shapeshifting" that got me laughing too much man. That might be the line of the night.
The match had Creed and Sabin teaming up. Still laughing. Sorry Creed but when I see a grown man in little american flag tights I am just wondering if a superman cape came with it and what's in the Hallowe'en bag.
They went against Beer Money Inc. just once I would like to see Roode come out in full hockey gear, just once.
I have to say I was disappointed by this teaming. I don't know if they just haven't worked together enough or what the case is but, it lacked something. And then they lost to Beer Money Inc. Told you that teaming was lacking something.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Ask Ardeth

Time to dig into the fang mail for another batch of emails from beyond the grave.
Welcome to an overdue issue of "Ask Ardeth" Where anything that can be thought of to ask will be answered by my horror film Heavy Metal Goddess alter ego Ardeth Blood.


Dear Ardeth:

I'm a struggling film producer and was wondering what it would take to get myself noticed by the industry big wigs?

Yours in Regina


Dear Yours in Regina:

If I knew do you think I would still be slopping it around this town?


Dear Ardeth:

My boyfriend left me for another girl. I love him and want him back, could you give me a love spell? I understand that you are a witch and know how to use magic. Please. Please. Please. I will pay you.

Desperate in Moose Jaw.


Dear Desperate in Moose Jaw:

You don't want to do that. Trust me on this one. Once a cheater always a cheater, and you deserve better then that.
First off, I am not a "witch" as much as I am a little more then normal.
Second, if he left you for someone else, do you really truly want to go through that again? The trust is lost and trust is the cornerstone of relationships. I have never understood why any woman would "fight" for a man who cheated on them? It makes no sense at all. He's not worth getting back, he's not worth your desperation. Or your tears, or your sleepless nights. If he was lousy enough to walk out on you then let her deal with his crap and be thankful you don't have to anymore.
Third, any witch/spellcaster/priestess etc who charges you for a spell that does not own an Occult store is ripping you off. Most ingredients can be found in your home, garden or grocery. The real magick is in your desire for the outcome.
Fourth, if you really want to do a spell for love/sex/relationships I suggest you buy either The Salem Witches' Book of Love Spells by Lilith McLelland or Wicca Love Spells by Gerina Dunwich.


That's all the time we have for this one, come back around and see what other gobs of wisdom Ardeth Blood will dish out and serve to her fiends.

You can email Ask Ardeth at hardcorevampsprods@yahoo.ca

Salt the Wounds What Good Would It Do?


Yes that is a quote from the Headstones' album Smile and Wave. Have I mentioned yet this week how much I love Hugh Dillon?
No?
Well guess what my pets, I love Hugh Dillon. You know how there is that one celebrity that you admire and worship so much you are not sure if you want to be them or freal them. Hugh Dillon is that celebrity for me.
The whole reason I rented Down to the Dirt was because of Hugh Dillon being in it. Ended up he had 3 minutes in one scene and like two lines.
First time I heard the song "Cemetery" back in the early 1990's I was hooked. When I saw him in Dance Me Outside I knew that he was going to be major. Then came one of my all time favourites movies Hard Core Logo which was one of my favourite books too. I have copied his hair from the Teeth and Tissue cd cover, been slapped (and dipper bombed) for mimicking his gestures from the "Unsound" video (I am a mimic. Can't always help it) and called foolish for spending $45 on the first season dvd of Durham County without having even seen it (and will for the second too).
He's got a voice that makes me shiver. Back in 2001 I got the chance to see the Headstones live. No concert before or since has stayed in my brain but that one. I was standing at the edge of the stage and he came over and said hi in the middle of the song "And".

Rumours are flying that there is to be a sequel to HCL coming out sometime in the next year and half. Let's keep our fingers crossed that it does.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Are there any single straight men left on this planet?

Are there any single straight men left on this planet? Or have they all been eaten by moose?

Straight up I need to know. Cause it seems the only men I am meeting anywhere for any reason are gay men or married men. How unfair is that?
And it's summer time, shouldn't those straight men be out beaching themselves like whales and other large land mammals? Where are they all hiding? I have checked the comic book store, the beer store, the sports gear store, none. Not one whale like human land mass. What's going on here?
I know it's June, but not everyone in town is getting married...are they?
This is why I never get invited to all the good parties and BBQs. Because I am single and those are always couple only events. Okay so the BBQ part has alot to do with being vegetarian too, but still more to do with being single and not having an even amount for dinner.
I mean seriously, throw me a bone here people. Let me know where all the single straight men are hiding. Or you know, if they are being digested by large woodland creatures.

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