What I learned from Sex and the City Volume 4

I used screen capture for this post

I was watching season 6 of SATC last night, the episode called Perfect Present (commonly known as the double finger episode) where Carrie is having a bad reaction to Berger's bad reaction to a call from his ex.

This episode is all about the baggage we carry with us from past relationships. There is a line where Carrie says "I was hoping not to have the ex talk"

I was thinking as I sipped my java watching the show, that anyone reading this blog has already been given my ex talk, as all my baggage is here in type.

THAT'S WHEN IT HIT ME!

I started this blog right after my last break up. This blog is my dealing with my baggage.  Or "Biggage" as Carrie calls it in the episode.

I fully believe that everything happens for a reason to whom it happens when it happens. 

It's been 3 years.  This blog has been Fun, Frealed up and Fabulous.  But it's time to close the door on my EX files.

I will still be checking this for any stray comments, and using it as archives linking it from my NEW BLOG to old posts. 

I'd be remissed if I didn't add a little something to my favourite Spudguns right now though.

Now, I know Mr Shelley's birthday is this weekend so I'm closing this blog out with a birthday shout out to him.   

Happy Birthday Mr. Shelley

Now come join me on my new phase in life and remember Life should be filled with Food Laughter and Bad Camera Work always

-Ardeth Blood

What do you mean I cant' watch that video in Canada

Let's start from the beginning.   and I am so going to get my ass kicked from my sister on this but who the freal cares Eh?
Picture it.... 1997, and I'm stranded on my mother's sofa with a broken leg for 8 months.  This was round one of surgery on my ankles.  Anyway,  my sister,  who is 8 years younger then I am, was going through some personal dren at that time.  This was also the time the Backstreet Boys released their first cd in Canada and France.  Ninja became obsessed with the BSB.   (that would be me getting my ass kicked right about now)
Now, I was a die hard metal head so any kind of fluffy pop music made me want to vomit. And I held on to that idea for a very long time.  Well, one night there's me trapped in the living room and my sister stretched out infront of the tv watching Backstreet Boys.  I found myself humming along.  I became hooked.  I admit it, fell head over crutches for Kevin of the Backstreet Boys, which worked out nicely as all my sister's friends seemed to have a thing for the other members and their little group was Kevin-fan-less.
It became the one thing other then Wicca that my sister and I bonded over at that time in life.
Well, she's long since dropped both, but I have not.

I have been reading Eat Pray Love this past week, finding myself wanting to listen to songs from about a decade ago which fits in the timeframe of the book.  And went on a mad search for one video by Nick Carter,  "Do I Have To Cry For You"  which is one of my all time favourite slow songs. Yes I'm a total weeping puppy when it comes to romantic mushy stuff.  So here's me searching the internet cause I want to watch this video from 2002, and I keep getting  "Sony Music has removed that video as it is no longer available in your Country".

Um what? Pardon me?  What do you mean I cant' watch it?  It's a music video.   It took some finding, but I did find one on the official Sony Music youtube.  I love this song it's so sappy.  I love this video cause the acting is so bad.  And well it's Nick.

I'm cute and funny

Damn I'm Cute!

A little hero worship never hurt

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The thing with addictions, sometimes rehab doesn't work and you have a slip and fall right back into your addiction.   I know I said no more silliness but... Damn it Janet!  Mr. Shelley is just so frealing hot! 

I can't help it   SIR I HAVE AN ADDICTION!   and he's beautiful I like to look at him.  Is it possible to overdose on a man?  Not sure, but I'm very willing to try. 
Okay, so I have the maturity of a cat in heat.  Alright enough creepiness for one morning, I'm off to book club, and yes I'll have another Book Dork is In  post when I get back later.

Dude, do not make me google

Patrick : Like Fall Out 3

Me : What?

Patrick: Fall Out 3.

Me:  What the hell is that?

Patrick: Woman Google It.

Me: Dude! We've been through this before, Do Not Make Me Google.  I don't google.

Patrick:  Start.  Cause now I'm not  telling you.

Me:  I don't google.

This is what many conversations with my buddy Patrick are like.  He knows I am pop-culture deficient. And he's a dork. Yes I said it, dork. But he admits to his dorkdom.  Do you?
My pop-cultureness ended around 2003 when Buffy got canceled.  I sort of ended up in a weird coma when it comes to what's hip and fresh and ... yes I just used the terms hip and fresh.  See, my dorkdom is showing.

Enjoy Your Hunk

I used screen capture for this post


Since it seems this is all I am good for....

A screen shot from the April 12th 2010 episode.
Yeah, iTunes Canada finally had it available for download.   Full week late.  Let's hope tonight's isn't too late (anything past Wed morning is late)

About those Tag Team belts

I used a screen capture for this post

Dear Mr. Sabin and Mr. Shelley

Last month I posted that if I did not see those tag team belts around your waists soon, there would be hell. Well, it's been a month, and you still have no TNA belts, so I must rant and nag...

What do you mean you lost your match to Matt Morgan the evil druid and Amazing Red? How could you let them beat you? You're better then that. Much better, you know it, I know it, the fans know it, most important you know it. (wait I said that didn't I?) I was sitting there watching the show (April 12th 2010 episode) thinking for sure this time. I mean man, the odds were stacked FOR YOU, what happened? Okay so this is more a whine then a rant but... what's going on? Where in the production notes did it say "Sabin gets pinned" that makes no sense, none. I'm going to pretend that Red ad-libed that part of the production notes, cause... why man why?

Is it your schedule? Are you too busy to hold those belts right now? Is it because of your injuries? Are you unable to hold those belts right now cause you are not healed enough from your injuries to be fighting champs?
Are the belts not pretty enough and you think they would clash with your tights? You could wear jeans to the ring that would look good with the belts would it not?

Are the belts too heavy on your hips cause your waists are so tiny? That's okay, they can take the belts in or you know you could wear them around your neck like you did your New Japan Jr Tag belts. You made those look sexy all wrapped like a winter scarf.

Dude! Come on already and win the TNA Tag Team belts!!! You should have had them like ten times by now but; no you just keep teasing me with being the number one contenders for the tag belts and then don't follow through making me disappointed with you. Why do you keep teasing and taunting me like that with promises of you being the TNA Tag champs then not doing it? .... It's cause I am Canadian isn't it? Have I not shown enough support and love to you guys?
You are the greatest tag team in the last 20 years, so why have you not won those belts yet?

Marilyn Manson is still cool right?

Stop laughing this is serious.   Well as serious as I can get.
I am doing a writing exercise, and need to create a character that is cutting edge, only my age is showing. Big time.
The character a 25 year old girl.     Me, a 36 year old woman.    See the issue.  

I got my musical taste from my Uncle.  Uncle was a metal head, and so was I.   Sepultura, Pantera, My Dying Bride, COC, Testament, Overkill, Motley Crue (Nikki Sixx is still a god!)  you get the idea.  I have a younger sister Ninja, who I used to go to concerts with back 13 years ago, boy bands mostly.  Her tastes have gone in a different direction from day one, Ninja and I are night and day to each other.  Anyways,  my musical evolution went from Sepultura to Frank Sinatra without missing a beat. Uncle's went to classical opera.  Yeah, no joke. Getting a lift from him now is filled with opera singers on his cd player.
 
I know for someone who spends their life online, I am so out of touch with pop-culture.  Are goths even still goths?  Are punks even still listening to Sex Pistols ?     What's going on here?

This is the big downfall of being a writer, you spend more time alone in your own world in your own head and loose total ability to socialize.  

Someone help!   Music,  seems I need some new stuff as does my character.   Leave me some notes on what I should be adding to my music collection.

How far are you willing to go?

Working on draft 3 of my novel, and am wondering... would a male masturbation scene be taking it too far?   Would that cross a line that just would destroy the core of the plot?
Hard to say.  Some people have already told me my novel is difficult to swallow.   Yeah, I threw good taste out the window the second I started working on the last draft. 

And what brought this thought on this raining morning over coffee?  

Well to be honest, I'm still waiting for this weeks TNA Impact to be available so I can do the weekly review, and decided to work on one of the main characters while I wait.  He needs to be given more personality.  That and I had a crazy conversation last night with a buddy about an old match from the Best of the X-Division vol 2.  (June 18th 2006 you can find it on iTunes even, 6 man contenders match)
 
My editor and my friend's mom who read the last draft both feel he's the strongest character in my novel. My Antagonist. My Heel.  So now I am just trying to get a better handle on this character, so to speak.

Who knew paperwork would have such heavy lifting

I just ripped apart chapter 1 of the novel.   Moved page 9 to page 1, deleted page 2, reduced a character to two sentences in a flashback scene, turned everything between page 3-8 into the flashback scene.

Dude, that's alot of heavy lifting, beat out now from all that jazz.  Surprisingly very hungry now too.  Nice workout for the mind.  And considering you know that the zombies ate my brain there last month it's a big workout. 

Psst why did the zombies eat your brain again?

Well Spudgun, remember I said I would schedule sending that email to Mr. Shelley after I let the zombies eat my brain...  

Some of my art

Why?  Oh god only knows why I am daring to make a bigger hoser out of myself, but I am.
Okay, you're getting a taste of my failures now.  And I've failed at everything I have tried my hands at, art, poetry, music, television, plays, films, the only thing I haven't failed at is comedy and that's only cause I haven't tried comedy yet.

This is the one painting I keep getting asked if it's for sale.  No it's not.  It took me a year to do, and I was not smart enough to right down the mix for the skin colour.  There is about 5 different colours in the mix for the dead skin.  I call him   "The Incubus"

This is a poem I wrote last year on March 28th 2009 that was turned into a song for a friend's play.

Somehow I died that night
Covered in memories of forgotten times
he spilled the wine
blacked out on a canvass of a better line
coked out and strangled by his own design

seems he loved me not as much as I loved him
seems he loved me not as much as the powered white lines fine
well I died that night
covered in memories of broken rhymes
locked out of moments that should have been mine

I died that night
burned out and battered like a prized fighter in a caged fight
lord knows I gave and I tried
but I somehow died that night

his vision cleared
but left his eyes bloody and wide
his smoke cleared
but left him sweating like a cop  was tailing him high
his vision cleared
but I had died that night

seems he loved me not as much as I loved him
seems he loved me not as much as the powered white lines
fine
well I died that night
covered in memories of broken rhymes
locked out of moments that should have been mine

I died that night
I died
I died that night
I died
lord knows I gave and I tried
but somehow I died that night


Here's another poem I wrote back in 2001 under the name Harley Lilith Noir   it's called  "Duet"


The partnership is born mist the mass confusion, over screaming the play, playwright, actors
Burning moonlight in their veins, the desire of hot flashes, gel covered lights, 
foot -candle-spot
The dance begins, tone on tone, the microphones combine intertwine a duet of mass reality, 
voices purge their sorrows, mixing-combining-liquid creamed,
Eyes closed throats thrown open, the final notes nothing but a high pitched scream,
The music's over, microphones recharged as the crowd applaud 
clap-whisper-cheer,
Flowers-carnations-roses appear, at their feet, shoes scuffing on their silky petals,
As the partnership dissolves in the nothingness, 
Shadows emptiness embracing the night,
Until the next duet -until the theater is filled once more from wall to wall,
Against locked doors

And the poem that Paula, Buddy #P, and everyone I talked about in this post here that everyone wanted me to either send to the guy or post.  Called "Stolen Moment" Well, I'll post it and if he reads it great if not ...   


Just a stolen moment
A piece of your time
A wordless glance
Maybe I' ll be fine
Your attention I feel the need to seek
Even though I know you are a million miles out of my league
Just a stolen moment
A second of your time
A polite nod
Maybe I' ll be fine
Your attention I feel the need to seek
Even though I know you are a million miles out of my league
What draws me to you I will never truly know
I guess that is part of your charm part of your show
Just a stolen moment
A piece of your time
A silent smile
Maybe I' ll be fine
Your voice the ultimate temptation
Your eyes demonically divine
Just a stolen moment
One half second of your time
It's all I ask as I memorize every fine line your face has to offer
Before you move back into the crowd and continue your day
A glance, a soft smile, a happy wink
I will return your way
To let you know if you ask I will give to you
Just a stolen moment


So there you go.  Pieces of me in all my morbid glamour

What you learn from Oprah

I used to be a complete devotee of Oprah.  God knows how much I spent between 2001 and 2008 on her magazines every month.  I even signed up for every newsletter her website had.
When I got rid of cable back in 2006, it was one show I missed... for awhile.  Well, I never canceled my email newsletters I still get those every day.
And today's lists this as Poetry Month.

Poetry Month!  Really?  the girl says in her best Miz impression.  REAALLLYYY?
Remember few days ago I was jammering on about how I had written a poem a full year ago for a guy and did not have the guts to send it, and how I needed a sign from the universe... well damn it janet.  I think that might be a sign. Maybe. 

Seriously, poetry is one of the most intimate things you can give someone.  I'm serious here. There isn't another form of creativity or gifts that are more personal then a poem. Yes, poetry and lyrics go hand in hand, they are the same thing after all, and many people don't think of music as intimate, but trust me it is.  When you are moved by a great song, or energized by your favourite band, think about the words, the voice the way you react.  

No, I'm still too much a coward to give the guy the poem, but remember this, Jim Morrison of the Doors was a master at both. Many called him Dionysus in human form, and Dionysus was the god of both poetry and music.

Follow me. 

Dear Thunder Bay TNA Fans An Open Letter

Dear TB TNA FANS:

I know you are out there, my hits tracker tells me that you are on the hunt for TNA coming to Thunder Bay.   Guess what,  I want that too!
So here's the deal,  leave a comment and help me in bringing  the X-Division to Thunder Bay.
The more people who ask, the better the chance of us getting a full on card of X-Division. 
If you're worried about being shy,  no need,  I have no shame and will be the loud mouthed redhead screaming on your behalf. 
By the amount of people who were crammed into the front doors of the Fort William Gardens last week for wrestling tickets,  it's more then obvious that we are starving for real wrestling. 
Okay Thunder Bay TNA Fans,  let's put a call into the darkness and get some X-Division to our little city.

Love Always Ardeth Blood
BlindTag.com

I got Quouted -Good or Bad?

Well, bloody hell Vim, it's a Marshall!    - Comic Strip Presents More Bad News A Heavy Metal Nightmare

Get this, remember my rant the other day  about the whole Mommy Bloggers thingie. 
Well, I got quoted.  I did.  And it was by someone I have never heard of before!  Spiffy very spiffy. 

I'll link to them cause that's what you do.  And I stand firm behind my words.   I believe that all press is good press. 

Some evil to your head

Quoting Artificial Joy Club song Psychic Man for that opening title.

Okay, so I have said on this monster mash over a year ago that I had started trying to learn belly dancing. Trying being the key word. Why I am not getting too far with it, and there for no vid of me yet at it, has alot to do with my shoulder/ribs and back.

Remember the car accident I had back on Sept 1st 2006, it mangled my entire right side from my waist to my shoulder. And well I have that nasty back issue since I was 10. But anyway, I started up again with the trying to learn belly dance. Seems when I am not trying I seem to be able to make a hoser out of myself by half way dancing.

Let me set the photo for you shall I. When I think about doing the moves, my zombie eaten brain can't seem to get my stupid body to move, but when I am standing around just waiting for a bus with my iPod on, well I end up having people stare at me like I am having a fit or something.

Yes that's right my Spudguns, I dance when I am not even thinking about trying to. And I'm sure that I make for a fairly interesting - to say the least- idiot of myself without even trying to.

So the message of the day is .... Don't even think about it. Move, groove and be on intuition.

Which brings me to my next little mouth dropping.

I have shown my ability for poetry. I was published years ago when still in high school, and college and a few years after that, in local papers and an underground American mag (Macabre Manse Best of Gothica and Beyond) And I've added bits and pieces on this bloggy-blog over the years.
Well, last year I had written a piece for a guy. I never gave it to him, totally chickened out cause I'm a total coward. But I did show it off to a few of my friends and their husbands. Wanting mostly the opinion of the very straight married guys. The reactions were like this....

50 year old Female friend : "If he doesn't scoop you up right on the spot he's a looser who doesn't deserve you."
Her husband : " That's beautiful. Send it now send it now. That's just beautiful"
Her 20 something year old son : " You have a nice way with words. I could turn that into a song."
The High Priestess : "KIM!!!! SEND IT!!! He's going to love it"
High Priestesses husband : he had nothing to say cause he cried. I made a 35 year old straight man cry with my writing.

Well, I am a coward and just could not send it. Freal, I don't even know if he's into poetry. That would be a big bad had I sent it to this guy I don't even really know, and find out he doesn't even like poetry right... right?

And the point is still go with your gut on things. My intuition was to write the pretty little poem and send it to him. Here I am a year later and it's just too late. This is one fear I don't think I can face. And no, I am not going to post that one here. It's too revealing, too innocent, too raw, too naked. No, it's not a dirty smutty poem either, just very ... sugary. Not the me I have let you all see on this blog. It's more Kimberly less Ardeth.

I just can't seem to get it out of my head to send it to him. The universe needs to start sending me some clear signs cause I'm as mixed up emotionally as a girl can get.

Why am I still red?

I just spent the last hour bleaching out my hair. I should be white, but no, I am still red.
Dude, I just want to be ... well not red.
The last 4 times I've tried to bleach out it has not worked, and one of those was at a stylist. They used their industrial strength colour and it did nothing.

This today was a bottle job and I'm still red. A shade and a half lighter towards blonde, but red none the less.

What's going on here? There was one stylist a few years ago who could bleach me out to a perfect white, he's not around anymore. Moved. Damn it!

The last time I was at the stylist a year ago, she asked me what my natural colour was. I was my natural colour at that time, auburn red. She made a face and took in a deep suck of breath saying that it would be impossible to get much more then a lighter red as auburn are almost indestructible . Her words not mine.
So it would seem she was not joking.

So the universe wants me to stay a redhead does it? I can only guess that means that my soulmate must dig reds.

Yummy ...

Please head over to comedy central... er um I mean My Newfie Kitchen to see the latest episodes of my cooking videos.

Episode 2 is my challenge to the MMG
Episode 3 is my Ugly Ramen
Episode 4 is making homemade Bread

They're funny funny things.
Life should be about food, laughter and bad camera work. Always.

Blogging in the kitchen

Spudgun, I'll be working over on the cooking blog for the next while. Now that the weather is nice I am able to get out of the apartment to get to the grocery and mom's and such to make the recipes and all that fun stuff.

I'll also be posting all the rants I know are coming to do with my oven blowing up.... oh right I didn't tell you about that.... I posted it on the cooking blog.

So, hop over to My Newfie Kitchen for the next few days cause that's where I am going to be for a bit.

I hope to have finished reading My Life In France by Julia Childs this week too, where upon I'll post a review on that blog.
As well, I joined a bunch of internet food groups. So, I want to bring in some fresh readers from those sites.

Don't worry, this weeks TNA will still be posted here. Otherwise .... Bon Appetit

And what about the non-mommy bloggers?

I saw the article in the New York Times about the mommy bloggers meet up.
I saw some of the bad reactions from the angry mommy bloggers.

Dude, what about the rest of us?

The article made it seem like the only kind of blog out there is the mommy blog. It made it seem like the only women blogging were the ones who used to be CEO and are now just filling time talking about dippers and cashing in their ad-sense.

There is a whole untapped group of us non-mommy bloggers out there.
Don't get me wrong, if you are a stay at home mom who managed to make a name for yourself, great more power to you, like being Diane Keaton in Baby Boom, having it all. Only instead of a boardroom you're using a laptop.

But there are other women bloggers out there.
And I don't see why the mommies are getting all huffy. All press is good press right? Means someone is talking about you; you grabbed someone's attention.