Ask-Ardeth

Time to dig into the fang mail for another batch of emails from beyond the grave.
Welcome to an overdue issue of "Ask Ardeth" Where anything that can be thought of to ask will be answered by my horror film Heavy Metal Goddess alter ego Ardeth Blood.




Dear Ardeth:

I was wanting to know why when you do your wrestling reviews do you always do parts in colour and have the Motor city machineguns at the bottom even when they are not the main event?
P.S. I read your blogs ANDREW and NEWFIEKITEN regularly. When will you be updating NEWFIEKITEN?

Signed Pat in Bonnyville Ablerta

Dear Pat:

I will start first by addressing the fact the cooking blog is called My Newfie Kitchen not Newfiekiten. I will be updating the cooking blog in a few weeks when I have the time to put into kitchen experiments. Also when I am not so broke and can buy more then just ramen noodles.
Second, I like to highlight my little brainwaves that I think are important or that do not have anything direct to do with the match. If it's not a move by a wrestler but my reaction then why have it the same print?
And the MotorCityMachine Guns! I like having a pattern to my work. I first started out giving them the end paragraph months ago because they happened to have alot of air time that one week and I liked the idea. My regular readers know that if they skip to the bottom and see the opening line "And the MotorCityMachine Guns!" that they were on that week. And given the majority of my readers are MMG fans it's easy for them too.

That's all the time we have for this one, come back around and see what other gobs of wisdom Ardeth Blood will dish out and serve to her fiends.

You can email Ask Ardeth at hardcorevampsprods@yahoo.ca

Ask-Ardeth

Time to dig into the fang mail for another batch of emails from beyond the grave.
Welcome to an overdue issue of "Ask Ardeth" Where anything that can be thought of to ask will be answered by my horror film Heavy Metal Goddess alter ego Ardeth Blood.


Dear Ardeth:

I agree with you that Chris Sabin is a hottie! Please post more pictures of him!!!!!!

Signed Sabin's #1 UK fan


Dear Sabin's #1 UK fan:

Almost everyone agrees with me that he's hot. Or as I like to say, hotter then hell in a bathtub. As far as posting more photos of him, I can only post screen shots when I get an episode of the show.
This is starting to get crazy. I'm getting fan mail for Chris Sabin.
People, understand I'm just a fan of his myself . I have talked about this fact before, I have never actually met him nor have I ever talked to him. All I know of him is what I see on the show every week.



That's all the time we have for this one, come back around and see what other gobs of wisdom Ardeth Blood will dish out and serve to her fiends.

You can email Ask Ardeth at hardcorevampsprods@yahoo.ca

Ask Ardeth

Time to dig into the fang mail for another batch of emails from beyond the grave.
Welcome to an overdue issue of "Ask Ardeth" Where anything that can be thought of to ask will be answered by my horror film Heavy Metal Goddess alter ego Ardeth Blood.

Dear Ardeth:

Who is Spudgun and why have you started to address them all the time? Are you dating someone?

Signed Confused in Mount Pearl.


Dear Confused in Mount Pearl:

I'm a big fan of British comedies, and one of my favourite shows is Bottom. There is a character on the show who is like the middle man between the audience and the other characters named Spudgun, who always asks the obvious questions. I had been watching a Bottom dvd one afternoon before doing a few posts and had the character in my head. No I am not seeing anyone at the time of this post.


Dear Ardeth :

Why did you stop wearing the wig you were so hot looking as a redhead.

Signed B. in Calgary


Dear B. in Calgary:

I stopped wearing the wig on camera simply because the wig got destroyed from over use. And thank you, I am actually a natural redhead, I just feel more comfortable as a blonde.


That's all the time we have for this one, come back around and see what other gobs of wisdom Ardeth Blood will dish out and serve to her fiends.

You can email Ask Ardeth at hardcorevampsprods@yahoo.ca

Ask Ardeth

Time to dig into the fang mail for another batch of emails from beyond the grave.
Welcome to an overdue issue of "Ask Ardeth" Where anything that can be thought of to ask will be answered by my horror film Heavy Metal Goddess alter ego Ardeth Blood.


Dear Ardeth:

I read your wrestling blog Blind Tag and like the layout you have going on. But why is it that you only show pics from TNA and not from WWE? And why is it you never have any pics of the Divas/Knock outs?

Signed WWE fan in TEXAS


Dear WWE fan in TEXAS

Very simple. I download TNA weekly from iTunes Canada. I take screen shots of things from the shows. WWE is not available on iTunes Canada thus no screen shots.
I will start taking a few more of the women if enough people ask. So far no one has.
If any wrestlers in the Indie companies want to grant us photos to use I will gladly use them. If any one reading this has photos they have taken themselves at live shows and want to send them in, I will use them.



That's all the time we have for this one, come back around and see what other gobs of wisdom Ardeth Blood will dish out and serve to her fiends.

You can email Ask Ardeth at hardcorevampsprods@yahoo.ca

Ask Ardeth

Time to dig into the fang mail for another batch of emails from beyond the grave.
Welcome to an overdue issue of "Ask Ardeth" Where anything that can be thought of to ask will be answered by my horror film Heavy Metal Goddess alter ego Ardeth Blood.





That's all the time we have for this one, come back around and see what other gobs of wisdom Ardeth Blood will dish out and serve to her fiends.

You can email Ask Ardeth at hardcorevampsprods@yahoo.ca

Ask Ardeth

Time to dig into the fang mail for another batch of emails from beyond the grave.
Welcome to an overdue issue of "Ask Ardeth" Where anything that can be thought of to ask will be answered by my horror film Heavy Metal Goddess alter ego Ardeth Blood.


Dear Ardeth Blood

I love the fact you are faithful to Total Non-Stop Action Wrestling (TNA) and I love that you support it so much. But why is it you never comment on other things like other fans do, you never talk about the wrestlers lives, their bios, their other events for other companies.

Yours "weekly" J. in Timmins Ontario

Dear Yours weekly

I have stated before, I don't like to know too much about my favourite wrestlers as it ruins it for me. I stay away from "official " fan sites, I stay away from biographies on them, I stay away from their Myspaces and Facebooks. I do not read other "dirt sheets", nor do I read anything listed in the wrestling threads on any of the horror forums I am part of. And trust me there are alot. I care about the performance they do each week on the show, if by chance they come to my area and do a live event I go and watch, otherwise I have found from past experience that it's disappointing to learn too much about my heroes. Besides, everyone is human and they deserve to have some privacy like the rest of us.
Why do you think so many of the wrestlers have a stage name? So that their families are not over run with fangirls/fanboys.
As far as not addressing their works in other companies, I will say that if you head to my other blog Blind Tag Blog you will find that the crew I am working on that blog with are doing their best to cover as much as possible on all the companies. There are only 3 of us at the moment on that blog and it is only a few weeks old, but we are doing our best.



That's all the time we have for this one, come back around and see what other gobs of wisdom Ardeth Blood will dish out and serve to her fiends.

You can email Ask Ardeth at hardcorevampsprods@yahoo.ca

Ask Ardeth

Time to dig into the fang mail for another batch of emails from beyond the grave.
Welcome to an overdue issue of "Ask Ardeth" Where anything that can be thought of to ask will be answered by my horror film Heavy Metal Goddess alter ego Ardeth Blood.


Dear Ardeth:

I love that you do your weekly "Thoughts on TNA" but I want to know why you never mention the Knock-Outs ? You talk about the X-Division all the time but never the Knock-Outs.

Signed an Angelina Love fan in Hamilton.


Dear Angelina Love fan :

I have never been a fan of women wrestling.



Dear Ardeth:

Why is it you have such a plan looking blog on Alucard's Rose. It doesn't have any blood or bats or any music playing on it. You should add some more gothic stuff to it, and change the colour to black or deep red. Why is it pink. It's not a very goth blog for vampires.

From The Dark One in Brandon Manitoba


Dear Dark One:

I am not a goth contrary to popular belief. I did not want my vampire blog to be the same old thing everyone else was doing. I do not feel the need to have a lot of extra dren cluttering it up. It is a news style blog, and therefore is fine the way it is. I picked pink because the title is Alucard's Rose, it fits with the mood I was trying to create.




That's all the time we have for this one, come back around and see what other gobs of wisdom Ardeth Blood will dish out and serve to her fiends.

You can email Ask Ardeth at hardcorevampsprods@yahoo.ca

Ask Ardeth

Time to dig into the fang mail for another batch of emails from beyond the grave.
Welcome to an overdue issue of "Ask Ardeth" Where anything that can be thought of to ask will be answered by my horror film Heavy Metal Goddess alter ego Ardeth Blood.



Dear Ardeth:

You list yourself as being proud to be on the D-List in the Blogosphere. What on earth would make you do such a thing and why are you not trying to raise your status? You are not making any money at this nor are you getting any real fame so why do you keep at it? And why are you proud to be such a looser?

Signed Celebrity Chaser in Selkirk Manitoba


Dear Celebrity Chaser in Selkirk:

If you are so put off by my low end status why are you still reading me and following my life?
I must be of interest to you if you feel the need to point out my D-List ability.
Not everything is about money. Not everything is about fame.
My status may change it may not, but you will always be an asshole.



That's all the time we have for this one, come back around and see what other gobs of wisdom Ardeth Blood will dish out and serve to her fiends.

You can email Ask Ardeth at hardcorevampsprods@yahoo.ca

Ask Ardeth

Time to dig into the fang mail for another batch of emails from beyond the grave.
Welcome to an overdue issue of "Ask Ardeth" Where anything that can be thought of to ask will be answered by my horror film Heavy Metal Goddess alter ego Ardeth Blood.


Dear Ardeth:

I'm a struggling film producer and was wondering what it would take to get myself noticed by the industry big wigs?

Yours in Regina


Dear Yours in Regina:

If I knew do you think I would still be slopping it around this town?


Dear Ardeth:

My boyfriend left me for another girl. I love him and want him back, could you give me a love spell? I understand that you are a witch and know how to use magic. Please. Please. Please. I will pay you.

Desperate in Moose Jaw.


Dear Desperate in Moose Jaw:

You don't want to do that. Trust me on this one. Once a cheater always a cheater, and you deserve better then that.
First off, I am not a "witch" as much as I am a little more then normal.
Second, if he left you for someone else, do you really truly want to go through that again? The trust is lost and trust is the cornerstone of relationships. I have never understood why any woman would "fight" for a man who cheated on them? It makes no sense at all. He's not worth getting back, he's not worth your desperation. Or your tears, or your sleepless nights. If he was lousy enough to walk out on you then let her deal with his crap and be thankful you don't have to anymore.
Third, any witch/spellcaster/priestess etc who charges you for a spell that does not own an Occult store is ripping you off. Most ingredients can be found in your home, garden or grocery. The real magick is in your desire for the outcome.
Fourth, if you really want to do a spell for love/sex/relationships I suggest you buy either The Salem Witches' Book of Love Spells by Lilith McLelland or Wicca Love Spells by Gerina Dunwich.


That's all the time we have for this one, come back around and see what other gobs of wisdom Ardeth Blood will dish out and serve to her fiends.

You can email Ask Ardeth at hardcorevampsprods@yahoo.ca

Ask Ardeth

Time to dig into the fang mail for another batch of emails from beyond the grave.
Welcome to an overdue issue of "Ask Ardeth" Where anything that can be thought of to ask will be answered by my horror film Heavy Metal Goddess alter ego Ardeth Blood.





Dear Ardeth:

You claim that Alex Shelley is the "Sexiest Man Alive" yet you talk more about Chris Sabin. Why is that? Shouldn't you be talking more about Alex Shelley?

Signed Y.B in Thunder Bay.


Dear Y.B. in Thunder Bay:

The answer to that is no. Alex Shelley, as I have stated is the sexiest man alive which puts him at god like status. To blog too much about him would show fault in him and I don't want to think of him as having faults. Therefore, he's off limits for blogging about too much.

P.S. Yolanda I know it's you but thanks for being a repeat offender...er sender.


Dear Ardeth:

I heard you were kicked out of the Miss Living Dead Girl contest for being too old. Any truth to that cause I think you would look great as a corpse.
From your number one fan Mr. B. in Montreal


Dear Mr. B. in Montreal:

Hahahaha!
I am sure you would love that. No, I never got kicked off because I never entered. Gives a girl something to think about thou now.

P.S. Fangs for the Memories
P.S.S. And as I stated once before you are not my number one fan, he lives in Detroit.



That's all the time we have for this one, come back around and see what other gobs of wisdom Ardeth Blood will dish out and serve to her fiends.



You can email Ask Ardeth at hardcorevampsprods@yahoo.ca

Ask Ardeth

Time to dig into the fang mail for another batch of emails from beyond the grave.
Welcome to an overdue issue of "Ask Ardeth" Where anything that can be thought of to ask will be answered by my horror film Heavy Metal Goddess alter ego Ardeth Blood.




Dear Ardeth:

You are so cool! OMG!
What will you be doing for Beltane this year?
Can I come?

Love your #1 Fan Jeff in Wawa


Dear Jeff in Wawa

Yes I know I am cool that is why I am the Queen of Your Evil Dreams. Well, given that I am a Dionysusian and Beltane is the day we celebrate Dionysus's wedding (he was the only Greek deity to be faithful to his wife) I will be preforming some very involved sex rituals via the style of Crowley. (just kidding. Kinda)
You can come all you want, just not here and not on the floor.

P.S. I don't think you are my #1 Fan as he lives in Detroit.


Dear Ardeth:

What ever happened to the actor who played Merton on the hit Canadian tv show Big Wolf on Campus?

from D. S. in Montreal


Dear D.S. in Montreal

What do I look like a tv guide? Google him.



Dear Ardeth:

I heard a rumour that you would be hosting a Halloween night bash at the Sleeping Giant? Any truth to this?

From Yolanda B. in Thunder Bay



Dear Yolanda B. in Thunder Bay:

No! No! and for the last time No!
Stop asking me to host that crap! I do not support your save the tavern group. Please, ask someone who cares about this crappy city.


That's all the time we have for this one, come back around and see what other gobs of wisdom Ardeth Blood will dish out and serve to her fiends.

Ask Ardeth

Time to dig into the fang mail for another batch of emails from beyond the grave.
Welcome to an overdue issue of "Ask Ardeth" Where anything that can be thought of to ask will be answered by my horror film Heavy Metal Goddess alter ego Ardeth Blood.








Dear Ardeth:

Why is it you never review WWE shows on your blog? I am a big fan of Jeff Hardy and want to know why you never talk about how much he rocks?
From Chair to the Headlock in Vancouver


Dear Chair to the Headlock:

I talk about TNA Impact because I like wrestling, not lameass- no- talent-melodrama that is on wwe shows. I also really think Jeff Hardy does not do anything worth talking about. Infact can't that dude just pick one hair colour and stick with it for like even a day?
So to answer your question, wwe is a badly written soap opera with guys who can not wrestle and only know how to smash each other with chairs.



Dear Ardeth:
Can I see your boobs? Are they real?
From Grabbyhands in Kitchener


Dear Grabbyhands:

No you may not see them and yes they are real.



That's all the time we have for this one, come back around and see what other gobs of wisdom Ardeth Blood will dish out and serve to her fiends.

Monday Again?

Okay, that is kinda pissing me off. I have to go hunting down the list of blogs in the dashboard to find my own since getting the sl newspaper job.


Welcome to an overdue issue of "Ask Ardeth" Where anything that can be thought of to ask will be answered by my horror film Heavy Metal Goddess alter ego Ardeth Blood.


Item : Ardeth I just love your hair! How can I
get my oh so blah do grooving like yours?
From Drippy in Halifax

Well Drippy, thanks for the desire to be like me. The answer to that isnt as simple as one might think. First, you have to make sure you get the highlights just right, I suggest going to the Undertaker for that just hit and run look, then you have to use alot of product such as firm hold spray, and of course running around in empty graveyards getting dead things caught in it is always the best way to keep it fresh.

Item: Ardeth my husband left me for a younger woman. What do I do now, I have nothing?
From Heartbroken in Gander

Hey there Heartbroken. Depends on your age, if you have any little gremlins hanging off your shoes or not. I suggest if you are over 18 and have no kids, hit the nearest bar and find yourself a fisherman. If you do have kids, leave them with your mother and hit the nearest bar and find yourself a fisherman. If you husband was a fisherman, then try to find yourself a trapper. Bake a p-berry pie and go to the Salvation Army for Sunday potluck and see where your luck takes you.

Item: Ardeth, why is it that you never do zombie movies on your show?
From LivingDead in Saskatoon

LivingDead, I just don't like zombie films.


That's all the time we have for this one, come back around and see what other gobs of wisdom Ardeth Blood will dish out and serve to her fiends.