What I learned from Sex and the City Volume 4

I used screen capture for this post

I was watching season 6 of SATC last night, the episode called Perfect Present (commonly known as the double finger episode) where Carrie is having a bad reaction to Berger's bad reaction to a call from his ex.

This episode is all about the baggage we carry with us from past relationships. There is a line where Carrie says "I was hoping not to have the ex talk"

I was thinking as I sipped my java watching the show, that anyone reading this blog has already been given my ex talk, as all my baggage is here in type.

THAT'S WHEN IT HIT ME!

I started this blog right after my last break up. This blog is my dealing with my baggage.  Or "Biggage" as Carrie calls it in the episode.

I fully believe that everything happens for a reason to whom it happens when it happens. 

It's been 3 years.  This blog has been Fun, Frealed up and Fabulous.  But it's time to close the door on my EX files.

I will still be checking this for any stray comments, and using it as archives linking it from my NEW BLOG to old posts. 

I'd be remissed if I didn't add a little something to my favourite Spudguns right now though.

Now, I know Mr Shelley's birthday is this weekend so I'm closing this blog out with a birthday shout out to him.   

Happy Birthday Mr. Shelley

Now come join me on my new phase in life and remember Life should be filled with Food Laughter and Bad Camera Work always

-Ardeth Blood

Um Okay

Season 4 of Sex and the City gave us Tampons on the Table.  Where else can you have an talk about fertility and abortions over brunch and get away with tampons on the table in public?

SATC2 is in 16 days.   I had hoped to have a few new posts on the show for a countdown, but things have not been going as planned.

1. I have to read Jane Slayre for book club.   (which I had put on hold for week cause of Eat Pray Love) 
2. I have some how once again re-injured my back.  Yeah nice Eh?   Just sitting here for the five minutes its taking to do this post has me in tears.  So I won't be doing a whole hell of a lot around here for awhile.  The wrestling event is this weekend and I need to be able to stand up semi-straight for that so, right now there is much laying around with ice packs. 
3. I don't really have a third point I just thought two looked odd.

The perfect date

Oh my... this will get .... Tacky. 

So, few days ago, I was having one of my normal conversations with my buddy Patrick (odd to everyone around us, normal to us)  about something we read on the internet.  And Patrick goes "sounds like he was giving you date ideas"

No I will not fill you in on what we were reading.

But, it did start a mad fit of laughter from me for about fifteen minutes.   What can I say, when something gets me going I am difficult to turn off.
and now, few days later the conversation has popped back into my head.  
I can't help but wonder,  with the release of the new Sex and the City 2 in a matter of weeks, what would be a good modern date.  Why the connection to SATC2 when I have no intention of going with anyone nor am I dating anyone to go with anyway.... Cause it's SATC2! Women in this city are buying new outfits and shoes and saving money to get to the opening night.  Trust me, it's an event.  Sadly, I won't be going the opening night, I'll have to wait a few days for the crowds to die down, besides it will be right after the Great North Wrestling has been here so you know I'll be dead broke... were was I going with this... OH Right dates.

Everyone is different.  And as I learned last summer from the string of bad ones, dating is something I lack any skill at.  No, I will not be trying that experiment up again this summer once was enough.  Dude, you do realize that last summer was the first time in 20 years I had been on a "date"
Anyway, told you it would get tacky,  anyway, my ideas of a date perfect, good, bad or otherwise seem very well, old fashioned and boring to most the people I talk to.  They seem to find bar hopping for loud concerts or general drinking matches top on the list. Second on that list being hitting the hockey games. 
Really?  I mean really?  So what you're saying is that you need to be in a loud environment where you can't have any kind of conversation with the person and be very drunk in the process.  Dude, how uncomfortable are you with yourself?

For me it's simple.   Go for coffee maybe even one of the coffee shops that doesn't get much traffic so that you have it almost to yourself, and a walk. Which gives you the chance to get close if things are working, or you know run away if they're not.  And from there, and this is the big compatibility test, head back to my apartment to watch Big Money Hustlas.  

I could never love a man who doesn't love that movie.  If a guy can sit through that film, with me, and my rewinding on Monoxide's parts - he steals the movie in the feeties pajamas- and still be comfortable enough to enjoy the movie, well...  You know, I've never met a guy who can. 

Sex appeal What makes you melt?

I used a screen capture for this post

In season 6 of SATC, Carrie is talking about Berger, and what she calls the "zas-zas-zu" that little gesture that makes your stomach flip every time you see your crush.

For me, it's a laugh or smile or smirk. Same simple little gesture but with three different results.
Or one result if you really want to know. Me melting completely.

You've heard me talk on here before about Mr. Shelley's smile/smirk/laugh. And you know I dig comedians. Rik Mayall is one of my all time favourites. But it's not just the movement of the lips, it's the attitude that comes with it. The way a guy's eyes will light up when he's smiling, the little laugh lines that dig into his skin. I've said before about Sheamus having a fabulous smile, which lights up the place. That said, men need to smile more. Specially wrestling Heels.
Maybe it's that smirk all bad boys seem to be able to pull off with just the right amount of sexy abandon, or the innocence that a real smile can add to a guy who normally is the shy quiet one.

The fact that alot of men smile out of nerves when they blush, it adds to the idea that they are all yours. Even when they're not, or for that matter not that innocent.

Which brings me to the smirk. That little sideways smile usually accompanied by a slight nod and light grunt. Always leaves me wondering what's that guy thinking?
Dangerous. Very very dangerous. A properly timed smirk, can be as welcome an invitation as a properly timed kiss. And just the right dash of mystery can send a swoon through me.

I don't know about anyone else, but for me a simple smile and a willingness to laugh is always a turn on.

This was suppose to be a Sex and the City moment but once again I got distracted by a beautiful man.

Life should be about food, laughter and bad camera work always.

Seems I have cursed myself

You need to read this post first

Okay, now you have heard me say a million times that I believe in soulmates and that I am doing the Soulmate Secret by Arielle Ford. You have also heard me say a million times that I am a Pagan.
(hopeless romantic + practicing spellcaster who's main God/Goddess are Love/Sex God/Goddess + thinks the big puffy white a waste of time = crap I'm screwed) Well, you know how every other normal average woman on the face of the planet puts years and years and years of energy into the big puffy white layer cake and dress. Seems because I have not, I have unknowingly blocked and sabotaged myself.

NOW YOU TELL ME??????

Yeah, it would seem so. The Law of Attraction baby, the Law of Attraction. Because I have never seen myself having a "wedding day" and therefore never so much as ever even bought one damned bridal magazine, therefore never putting any energy into it, I've condemned myself to never getting married. I have never even been to a wedding

Can this be fixed?

Maybe, maybe not. Might be too late. Remember back in high school, having family planning class or home ec or whatever it's called now, well in grade 12 we had to do a wedding planning thingie. I just was not interested at all in any of it. I failed the project. I got 41% out of 100. I know this because this afternoon while I was hunting for something in the mess that is my apartment, I stumbled upon the project. Yeah no joke, I still have papers from 1991 sitting around in boxes. I'm a pack rat.

I still see nothing wrong with the drive-thru-wedding chapel. Nothing wrong with it at all.
Being Pagan, if I were to ever end up finding a guy who was willing to spend the rest of his life with me, I would be content with a handfasting. For those of you that don't know what that is, it's a marriage type ritual done by the High Priestess or High Priest. Every Alternative Religion has a version of it. And what was the point of my post I got off track again

I think it had something to do with the Law of Attraction and basic wish magick.

Yes of course Spudgun, she says a day later. Because I have not ever pictured myself having a big puffy white wasted day... er um wedding, and not put the energy into creating the perfect "day", I have unknowingly set up a huge roadblock to ever meeting my soulmate and having a happily ever after. That means, I can try to put some energy into creating that imaginary "special day" and hope it's enough to turn around my bad mojo.

See, I really do not have the bride gene. It's like the lead character in the movie Cake played by Heather Graham, she is very anti-wedding and ends up having to run her parents bridal magazine. Her attitude is why do the big party when you can just live together.

Okay people, lets' see if I can honestly turn my attitude towards weddings around enough to bring some positive energy to the situation. Like I said, I only have to believe enough to turn the bad luck around... right?

You are more pathetic then we thought

I used screen capture for this post.

In season 5 of Sex and the City episode #(too lazy to check) called Anchors Away, the character of Carrie refers to her love of New York as an 18 year relationship.
More then once, I have said my love for wrestling is my longest relationship. It's always been there for me. It will be a 31 year romance next month.

My buddy Danny says I will never get married because my desire for TNA out weighs my want of a husband. I hate to have to admit it, but I think he's right.
I mean really, for nearly 5 years (since TNA debuted on the Spike network) it's been there for me without fail. Sure sometimes Impact is late for dinner (that's iTunes Canada's issue) and there are weeks where it's grumpy with me (when it's more filler then matches) and it can with hold claiming a headache (when the MotorCityMachine Guns! are not on air at all) but in the most part, it's all good baby.

I said last week in my post Where is Your Devotion when I was talking about the movie Mistress of Spices, that my writing was as close as I get with the topic of religion. I think it goes hand in hand with the idea that wrestling would be my longest romance, and TNA being my longest affair. The X-Division love me. They read me every week.

Wrestlizers

I got called a "Wrestlizer" by this guy who is friends with my friend's husband.

Is that even a word?

In episode 2 of Sex and the City season one, Models and Mortals, we are introduced to the world of men who only date models.

According to this guy, because of my addiction to wrestlers, I am the female equivalent of a modelizer. To my understanding, you have to date only models to be a modelizer. Therefore, I would have to date only wrestlers in order to be a "wrestlizer".

Are you seeing the big flaw in this guy's theory like I am. I am not dating any wrestlers. I am not dating anyone.
I am not sure if I should be insulted or flattered that this guy would think that I would/could only date wrestlers.
I'm still a little lost on this one myself. I admit the guys in my past have been local musicians and actors more so then anything else (which got very tired after I turned 32) and I'm friends with indie wrestler Cole Cash so yeah, I suppose I do get tangled up with semi-celebrities.

But to call me a "wrestlizer" that's just ridiculous.

Fact- I have never dated a wrestler
Fact- I can't even get a wrestler to agree to an interview let alone a date
Fact- I have a total hot spot for geeky guys so I will date more then just wrestlers

Poll Replies

I asked the question in my poll recently if "it would be wrong for me to date a man I don't like just to have something new to blog about?" it seems my Spudguns you all feel it would be wrong of me.

It doesn't seem to matter anyway as the dude never phoned when he said he would. So no harm done. But, I have given our favourite topic (Mr. Sabin and his hair) a full year. It's long since run it's course and I need to start blogging about other things now. As I said to Buddy #P "I've talked about him so much it's time to either turn this into a fan site or Mr. Sabin needs to marry me."
Buddy #P laughed for a good ten minutes.
It's funny. Very very funny. Okay, so I just scared the crap out of Mr. Sabin and he'll need therapy for months and I am sure half the X-Division guys are pissing themselves laughing right now as they are huddled around a laptop reading this. Cause they love me, they adore me, they are my number one fans.

So at this point I suppose I have to resort to double blogging everything I do. In other words, every time I do a book review on my book blog I will need to repost it here, and everytime I blog on the cooking blog I will need to repost it here. And the pagan blog and the vampire blog just to have more things to talk about. Cause, really, I'm running out of topics. Cause I have no life, and need a husband. Even I get sick of my rants. I'm trying my best to be more positive and not so bitchy. And even the Sex and the City posts can only take me so far, I have talked about I think all the SATC episodes. I can't move on if I am stuck in a rut. Not that I consider Mr. Sabin a rut. (insert obvious dirty joke here)

You ever miss just being kissed?

*deep sigh*

I have not been able to get out of my mind all week, kissing. Yeah, just good old fashioned standing in the hall by the door saying good bye for the day make out sessions.

Making me feel like the one episode of SATC where Carrie says that she's at the point of walking up to total strangers and asking them to kiss her and just lay on top of her to feel the weight of a man again. (season 5 episode ? too lazy to check the dvd)

And top it all off, I read an article online this morning about the benefits of the good morning kiss.

Great, thanks, make me that much more out of my mind.

Strange thing to miss I know, but if you haven't figured out by now that I'm a hopeless romantic and totally single then you have been I am guessing only reading my TNA (Total Non-Stop Action) stuff?

And of course, what makes a good kiss. I've had guys who don't close their eyes when they kiss, and it's a bit on the creepy side, or guys who don't tilt their head when they kiss you, that always leaves me wanting to ask if they need a neck brace or something. Very uncomfortable. When a guy doesn't use his hands. That's so giving the vibe of him not being into you as much as you are into him.
Or the worst yet, a guy who is all mouth. You walk away from that one thinking "he just raped my face. Was he trying to lick the remaining make up off or something?" Makes you wonder if he learned to kiss from his dog?

A good kiss is paced just right, with just enough hand movement to make you want to lean in closer, and a guy who allows himself to just melt into the moment. A soft half giggle/moan from the guy always a plus, let's us know you are enjoying it. And the end result should always be the look of half dreaminess on the guy's face when you do end the kiss. A look that clearly says "why did you stop? I can still breath"

So yeah, I miss that. Kissing.

Faking it, not just for women anymore

Season two episode 28 of Sex and the City Was it Good For You? the question of the week is "how do you know you're good in bed?"
The character of Charlotte has a guy fall asleep on her while they are having sex, and Carrie becomes the replacement vice for a guy with addictions.
In episode 16 They Shoot Single People Don't They? (also season two) the question of the week is "is it better to fake it then be alone?" Where Miranda has to fake it more then once with the same guy.

I was reading an online article about men having to fake it in bed. I have to be honest, I did not think it was physically possible for a man to fake it.
I know guys fake the rest of the relationship all the time, but in bed?

And before you get all into "well women fake it all the time" it's true that alot of women have faked it, many of us do not.
I have never. No it's not always that good, I just am rude and will tell the guy it's not working. I see no reason to fake it.
If you fake it once, and the relationship extends from a one night stand to a proper relationship or even just f**k buddies, then you are more then likely having to fake it every time.

That is false advertising.

So I put the question out there to a few of my straight male friends. Two were cool enough to reply.

Guy #1 - Never faked it. Never had to.

Guy #2 - Faked it with one girl, but she was a psycho. The relationship fell apart.

Hmmm. Makes me wonder about the way men and women really relate to each other? The more men are willing to communicate, the more it seems everything we have come to learn about them is just not true.

I have said before that if I live to be 200 I will not figure men out. Starting to think that is the ultimate truth. The more I learn about relationships, the less I understand.
Like Guy#2 telling me that men do get the goofy grins for hours afterward thinking about us the same way us women spend half our day after sex.
Interesting bit of info.

So I have to ask, faking it a plus or a minus?

New Candace Bushnell

So I am flipping through Chapters Online to see what I might want to buy this month, when I see something that makes me just a little hyper.
A title called "Carrie Diaries" on the Pre-Order list. Is it true? Could it be ? A new novel from Candace Bushnell?
Not just any but a Sex and the City book. Only thing is, there is no summery for it. I have no idea what this book is about. No clue where in the mythology of the Sex and the City world this book takes place. And of course, it's listed for April before it's to be released.
Totally genius given the second SATC movie is slotted for May.
So I googled Candace Bushnell books, and come across a newspaper article from 2008 that stated Bushnell was penning a series of young adult books that star her character Carrie Bradshaw.
Is this the mythical book?
As we get closer to the spring, you know I am going to be hounding my local book store.

And a cover goes here part 3.9

So, for the full length novel which I managed to get past my writer's block last night. It took watching the Best of the X-Division vol 2, plus many old episodes of Impact from the last while to get my brain to jump start and find a way around the blockage my story was hitting.
I am in talks right now with a local photographer about doing not just the cover art but all my other publicity crap I'll have to do for the novel. You know, a good photo for the inside cover and one for the damned paper if I choose to go that route. But given I hate Thunder Bay's media, I most likely will not submit my dren to them. Still, I'll need a really cool photo of me for the author bio.
And the cover art. Must not forget the cover art. It will all depend on what this dude charges. Seems he's just kind of starting up his business too so I might be able to snag a cheap rate.

SIR I HAVE AN ADDICTION! much like Carrie Bradshaw in Sex and the City season 3 episode 43 called Escape from New York. When she screams at the man when he tells her to put out her cigarette cause its a non smoking room. No one can ever tell me that Alex Shelley and Chris Sabin are not creatures created by Dionysus.
Can you really be addicted to celebrities?

I mean man, I am addicted to books, to movies, to tv shows. So why can't I class my constant babbling about Chris Sabin's hair as an addiction? I'm addicted to blogging. That's obvious. I mean, I have how many blogs. I lost count to tell you the truth.

I understand. I think

The more I know the less I understand.

Yes, I am sitting here listening to the Sex and the City movie soundtrack, and that one line from it was like a slap to the face.

I have been seeing a situation one way for the last 5 years and I was not willing to see it any other way.
Few days ago, I was in the process of a ritual and asked for a sign. I had a certain thing I wanted to happen if the choice was one direction and a certain thing if the choice was a second direction.
Within 24 hours I got my sign. And I realized I had been getting the sign for this choice for months I had just refused to see it.
The second I said okay this is the path the Fates want me to take, I felt this great wave of peace.

Sounds corny I know. But very true.
I had been fighting it for a long time.

It seems what I want and what I need in the situation are two very different things. And had I been paying more attention to the tarots, I would have understood that sooner.
The Lovers and the Twos are well love and relationship cards. They are also about choices, finding a balance with your emotional self and your physical needs. The day I asked for the sign, I had pulled the Lovers, the Two of Swords and the Two of Cups. All that was missing from that reading had been the Two of Pentacles and Two of Wands.
I also pulled the Ace of Cups and the Ace of Swords. The Ace of Cups is the true love and marriage card, the Ace of Swords is the warrior/champion card and the card of self esteem.

The Ace of Cups and the Ace of Swords have been popping up for months now in my readings. I had assigned them to people which can be good but when you get used to seeing them you start to forget what their real meanings are and only put them in context with the people.
I had been missing the message all these months because I had in my mind associated those two cards with two men. The message I was getting was not always about those two men, but something else all together.

Follow me.

Sex and the City 2

The teaser poster and trailer have been released.
I see they decided to not go with the traditional SATC pink but have up the scale with white, gold and silver.
You all know me, I'm a SATC junkie. I even have the shoe bag to prove it.

2009 the year of the blog

This was the most I've blogged in the whole 5 years I have been blogging. This was my busiest blog, better then ones I tried in the past.
And it's not even like I had more important things to say this year either, just more time on my hands with nothing else to keep my attention.
I was willing to get a little more intimate with some of the things going on in my life, and in my mind. I don't believe in holding back.

My weekly thoughts/review on TNA Impact was a hot topic. Brought in a steady flow of readers. I don't like to really call it a review as it was started out as my honest reactions to the week's show. I can't even point out when it became a weekly column so to speak, given I have been doing it for the last 4 years in one way or another on every blog I have had in the past. But this year, people took an interest in TNA more. Always a great thing. The real fans will always know the chocolate from the mud. If I have done nothing else this year, I hope I helped get the word out that TNA (Total Non-Stop Action) wrestling is where the talent is. I can't mark out for it enough. I am just a fan but I have been screaming my lungs out for you guys.

The few people who have shown some support in my writing career I have to give a big hug to. That has meant more then you will ever know. Not that I had much success this year with my writing, with two publishers frealing me around. That's what I get for not trusting my gut on it.

The misadventures in dating had alot of men shaking in their boxers. Nice to know I can still make men panic. Cause that is always a good affect on your ability to find a husband. Hey I don't call myself the Queen of Your Evil Dreams for nothing you know. I actually had one guy doing/saying things so that I would blog about him. Silly boy not like he deserved being blogged about, not like he's Shelley or Sabin or someone cool.

And the MotorCityMachine Guns! Of course my rants about Chris Sabin and Alex Shelley brought readers this past year. Some agreed with me, others did not. That's cool. It was never about being right or wrong, it was about finding a way to talk about Chris Sabin and Alex Shelley. Simple. Everyone has their heroes and their crushes. My crushes just happened to be the most amazing tag team out there. That's not lip service either. If you watch Global Impact 2, or the episode from Oct 22nd 2009 (that was the Ultimate X match) you will see what I mean. But then again, how can a million fans be wrong ? (96% of my blog readers are members of the MotorCityMachine Guns! fan groups)

An Emotional Survival Kit

What's in yours?

What? Spudgun are you talking jibberish?

What do you turn to when you are depressed?

Oh right *slaps forehead painfully* and emotional survival kit. I got it now.
That would be the entire Sex and the City series and movie, the Best of the X-Division Volume 2 and a very large bottle of Screech.
What can I say I'm easily distracted by clothes and boys.

But this got me thinking, most women turn to each other when they are in a crisis, and have big cry fests and spend all their time shopping together or go to a club where they flirt shamelessly with men they have no intention of leaving with.
I don't. Is there something wrong with the fact I would rather be at home watching some fictional image of a support group then actually being part of a real one?

Maybe, I don't know.

Then more thinking (oh that's bad. you know you over analyze everything to death then dig up the bones to analyze again ) about who I used to turn to as a kid.
The answer to that would be my cousins Billy and Deon. I grew up the tag along to my two older male cousins.
Then in grade school my friends were always guys. This progressed through high school and college.
I see the pattern now, sort of.

Well, you know from past blog posts that I don't really trust other women, and I do tend to get crushes on guys who are emotionally unavailable. But you would also think that I would understand men better then I do.

Nope, I have no clue. Which is why I end up needing the SATC dvds and the Best of the X-Division and the drinking. Usually to get over a guy.

Hey Spudgun any more stupid questions

Am I missing the Bride Gene?

You have heard me say a million times over that I need/want a husband, but you have never heard me say anything about a wedding.

I just don't get it? What is it that makes other women so psycho about having a wedding? The wedding is never for the couple, it's for the bride's mom. Plain and simple. It's a day for the bride's mom to show her daughter off to the world like a pony or something.
Pointless!

I have been chatting with a few other women in my women's group, and weddings are all any of them have been talking about.
My sister's friend just got married last month, after spending 3 years planning it. Three years!
That's nuts.

Marriage is not about who has the fluffiest dress or the most layers on a cake, marriage is about two people who decide they want to commit to each other.

I have said this before, why are "weddings" so damn interesting? No sir I don't like them.
And I personally see nothing wrong with one of those drive-thru-love-me-tender-chapels with an Elvis Impersonator as a minister.

Print catchy title here

But I don't have one.
I think I have referenced all the Sex and the City episodes, and all the Jane Austen novels. I am needing something new to compare things to.

I thought about using Buffy the Vampire Slayer/Angel, but to be honest, I don't see too much I can talk about from them in the way I have been with the other "chick-lit" stuff.
Come on now, I would only be able to talk about Spike's trenchcoat for one or two posts before it stopped making sense.

Not that I seem to make a hell of a lot of sense lately.

Have I burned myself out? No ,no, no, I can't be burnt out. I'm only 35. I have at lest another 70 years of writing in me.... don't I?

A writer who has lost their voice is worthless to the world.

Courtship and Crudeness

One of the members of the All Jane Austen Challenge posted on her blog as part of her challenge, the question of dating in our time vs Jane Austen's time.

This got me thinking. If you remember, way back I did an article for Divine Caroline called Should We Return to the Jane Austen Era? (May 2007) and with all my recent posts thought it might be time to return to that line of questioning.

I have been finding that more and more people are meeting through dating sites, and online in general. This giving them the chance to find out more about each other at a slower pace, then just getting together at a bar. Hell, I have met my last 5 boyfriends/lovers online.
And it's been a 50/50 success rate with them. Yes, I met the guy from Boston online, Dargo online, Freud online, and a few other oddities too.

What guy from Boston?

Oh right, he was back in 2005, and I wrote about him on an old blog way back when. He was sweet, 8 years younger then me....anyway back to the now.

What ever happened to blind dating? Like in Jane Austen's time, you were set up by a friend who was a strong member of society and knew everyone. Don't think in my 35 years have I heard any of my friends having blind dates.

Or the simple thing of going out on a walk? That was the one thing that in Jane Austen's time was allowed for two people to be "alone". Which they never truly were, as someone always had to accompany them. But it would give them the chance to talk while out of the house. Speaking of which, the house was where the action happened. Private dances, dinner parties, and short visits for tea. Why don't people do that anymore?

For a woman, you were not allowed to draw attention to yourself (which is why in Pride and Prejudice Kitty and Lydia are considered shocking) until after you were "out in society". Stop snickering. That is something I think should be returned to. Maybe we wouldn't have so many teenaged pregnancies if we followed a few rules instead of just running around like wild boars.
Few weeks ago I was roaming around the mall in my best zombie mode, when I spotted two 12 year old girls. Now, I know that they were that young without even having to get up close to them. And I know this, by the fact that no woman in this city over the age of 17 wears an outfit to rival the character Samantha in Sex and the City. By the time you are 17 in this city, you have out grown the need to look like a cheap hooker. Even the hookers in this city don't look like hookers. But these two kids were standing there in the middle of the mall dressed in 6 inch heels, tube top dresses, and hair that would make the lead singer of any metal band in the 1980's jealous. Yes it was that sad.

I think bars have spoiled the world for romance. Scratch that, for understanding. But that is another post for another time.

Fabulous or Frightening

This is a mixed post. Not really a "What I learned from Sex and the City" not really a "Are there any Straight Single Men left on this planet" but somewhere in between.


You have all been following my misadventures in dating over the course of this fabulous yet goofy blog, and you have photo proof of my physical self of which you are very aware I do not photograph well at all.
Still hitting that dating site every so often, seeing alot of hot guys on there. Maybe too hot.
Here is the thing, everyone and their dog's grandmother wants someone who's sexy, drool worthy and will make their friends/enemies/frienemies turn ten shades of green. And alot of these hot sexy guys know they are hot sexy guys. They can get any woman they want, and normally do. But they are not keeping them. For whatever reason, otherwise there wouldn't be so many of them on the dating site.

In the Jane Austen Book Club (movie version) there is a line by one of the main characters that says "the pretty marry the pretty , the ugly the ugly" which is true.

Or is it?

I am finding the average guys won't give me the time of day on there, but the hot guys are. Granted I am not getting any dates out of the whole thing but I have been getting some conversations that are surprising.
The most common thing they are saying, these underwear models/bodybuilders/ubergods is that they are not getting hit on. They all seem to be getting alot of views but no actual messages. Other then from me. But then again I am bold enough to take the risk. When you look like I have for the last 35 years of being on this planet (well okay you seen my photo of when I met Vampiro in 1999, I am ten times better looking now so....) you can't afford to wait for the man to say hi. Because you will be waiting till hell freezes over.

Some of these guys are too good looking. It's a bit of a put off, very intimidating. You see them and even if they sound down to earth (and all the men on the site no matter what their looks all claim to be down to earth and easy going) I end up freezing up with the little voice over my shoulder screaming at me that "someone that hot would never look at me". And I am sure I am not the only woman on the site having that voice in their ear.

And they all complain about how they are more then just their photos, then turn around and state that they want a thin, petite woman with big boobs.
Hmmm.
Or if you live more then 25 minutes away not to bother.
Double Hmmm.

Makes you wonder what's wrong with these guys? They seem to come across as knowing what they want, but if they are not finding it, there has to be something wrong with them, right?
Here's my theory. The uber hot men are too used to having a swarm of women after them that they are just sitting back and waiting. Waiting and looking sexy hot. While the women are too afraid to make a move because these men are too good looking.
Alot of the average guys meanwhile are on dozens of favourite lists, and the reason they are not giving me the time of day is because they are busy with the hot chicks.

Follow me?