Monday, June 8, 2009

Can you have a future is your past is present?

This should be a what I learned from Sex and the City post but the quote sums it up better. In episode 77 of season 6 (The Perfect Present) that was the question of the week.

After two years of total silence from Dargo, the big second chance of my life, I see he's updated stuff on his profile on msn. Something I wasn't prepared for. The coward in my couldn't look beyond the fact that it stated his name and an update. I can't handle it.
But this brings up all kinds of issues and thoughts for me. Just when I thought I was safe and comfortable enough to move on with whatever the universe threw at me, I saw this.

That was a football sized curve ball to the skull I didn't see coming. And reacted badly to.
Are we ever truly over our ex's or will they haunt us till we are ghosts ourselves?

Just seeing his name sent me into a tailspin. Which means I am no where near being over him as I thought I was. How do you move on when someone has that much of an effect on you even when they have long since moved on from you?
It's strange how the men in my life have left such a deep impact on me yet I have been nothing but a fly on the windshield of their lives. What is it that leaves so many of us shattered like this?
Are we pre-destined to attach ourselves to the wrong people? Or are we so flawed that it would take more then just duct-tape to patch us back together?

Can you have a future if your past is present?


wwegirl said...

there is a distinct possibility that even though you think he is over you. He may not be he may look from afar. Which does happen. I don't think we truly ever get over a ex boyfriend. I think they are part of us. And everything we do. They help shape us as women or men.

ardeth blood said...

If he is not over me, then I wish he would get ahold of me....Dargo.


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