There is this guy Joshua.
He has a weird effect on me. I have a blast when I talk to him. He's cute, funny, sexy even. And I end up doing things with him I would never do with any other guy.
We're friends. We have the same twisted sense of humour. And he keeps popping up on the dating sites I join.
I am completely free when I am with him.
Oh did I mention I have never met him outside of the computer? Yeah, he's my cyber f**k buddy.
Sad, pathetic and oh so yummy. This has been going on for a very long time. He's also my back up when things get totally crazy in real life, or some sleazy old guy/thirteen year old starts to cyberstalk me on Myspace or something. I just point to his profile and claim him as mine. I've had to do that more then once in real life too cause of one creepy Lesbian who works at the Blockbuster down the street.
Tonight, while we were doing what we do best, ripping apart the rest of the world, I brought up my last posting topic Which then got into the question of what we have being an emotional affair?
He wasn't sure. I'm not sure. As I said, this has been going on for a while, and we're both fairly attached to each other on one level. So why not turn it into something real?
Well, he lives in the U.S. and I live in Canada. (yes I have a thing for American men okay deal) the other AND/BUT in the situation is that we're not compatible.
I know I know then how can I be so damned free with him? You got me?
I'm looking for a long term relationship, and he's well, not. There is a bit of an age difference here too, he's 8 years younger. Okay so I'm a cyber-cougar-slut. Deal.
I see myself heading for a massive broken heart, but not really.
Confused yes very much.
It's great cause he takes the edge off of being alone, but it's bad because I'm always shocked at myself afterward. I've never considered myself anything but a Prude. So what is it about the very thought of this guy, the very sound of his voice that makes me... act like ... this?