My Thoughts on TNA Impact for May 13th 2010

I used screen capture for this post


Seems iTunes Canada loves me again this week, as last night's episode was available this morning for download.  At this point though they have not gotten the May 3rd episode. Their listing jumps from April 26th to May 13th 2010 and for anyone who wants to know how long it takes to do a review, I started at 7:30am.

Now I know the episodes have titles just like Buffy/Angel/Forever Knight/Sex and the City  but I use the air dates cause 1) most people search online by air dates and 2) dude, most times your titles suck.  (it's good to be back isn't it)
To the audience member screaming alone,  you know why your "Bishoff sucks" chant didn't work for ya, because it's better to play in a group then play with yourself.  That and the faster we let Bishoff do what he's going to do the faster we get past the filler and on to the show... I love the smell of coffee and sarcasm in the morning, goes so well with my complexion.

AJ AJ AJ... we've talked about the cufflinks in the ears... dude, too big and you know I've never been one for diamonds I like pearls. Pearls are nice and less... sparkly. Men should wear Onyx or Jet.
Okay you know what, just cause I'm in a good mood this morning, I will actually mention Jeff Hardy just this once,  but um dude, please stop with the dry humping entrance.

Knock Outs match  Wilde vs Tara... Tara won with a kick as Wilde was going for a cross body.

Someone cue the garlic juice... for the tears that what's her handle was trying to cry... Universal Studios for freals sake, you would think you had some better acting .... nice set up though for the storyline.

Kendrick vs Douglas Williams.   Kendrick still hasn't gotten decent theme music, dude you need to pencil that in okay... Williams made a speech about it being non-title as Kendrick jumped him in the corner with a series of forearms to the back. Williams fought back with a hard push then a forearm of his own rocking Kendrick. Tossing Kendrick then to the far corner, running full steam at him. Williams then followed with a snapmare but that only got him a two count.  Kendrick then started to throw hard punches at him before going off the ropes but was stopped cold by a shoulder block. Williams then used a drop knee to get the slight advantage over Kendrick, but Kendrick came back at him with a few kicks. Kendrick then off the ropes with a flying forearm/crossbody combo but only got a near fall. Williams then rolled out of the ring, and pulled Kendrick off his feet slamming his knee into the ring apron. Back in the center of the ring, and Williams slapped on a half Boston crab. Kaz then came to the ring to collect his belt, which was just enough distraction to let Kendrick roll up on Williams for the win.

Generation Me  vs Matt Morgan the evil druid... suppose I can't call him that anymore since he dropped the robe... in a handicap match.  Max and Jeremy jumped him as he was entering the ring. No good, he tossed them off like children and then delivered a double running clothesline that sent them flying. Morgan then grabbed the blonde one and gave him a hard vertical slam before going after the brunette with a nasty running boot to the face.  Still like to know what is it with wrestlers and long greasy hair? He then grabbed the microphone and blah blah blahed for a bit before grabbing the blonde one tossing him out of the ring and Samoa Joe came out to the ring giving Morgan a muscle buster. Then Nash and his crew came down to the ring, cashing in the fest or fired tag belts case.

Rob Terry vs Abyss. or you know not cause Abyss was being arrested. Snooze. Bored Now.
Okay here's the thing with Orlando Jordan,  no one is debating your talent.  We are debating your gimmick.  Dude, it blows goat backwards.  All puns intended.  Just drop the gimmick and wrestle.
Tomko came to the ring for a match then with Jordan. I happen to like Tomko.  He picked up Jordan slamming him into the corner then delivered a nice spinebuster.  Jordan countered with a double leg take down, then proceeded to deliver a few fists to the jaw. Both back to their feet, Tomko moved out of the way as Jordan went face first into the turnbuckle. Tomko then with a lovely powerful over head toss. Jordan then shoved Tomko into to the corner and followed up with a drop kick. He continued then to stomp on Tomko, getting him on the second rope for a rear chin lock. Jordan then with a short snap on Tomko before a knee to the back. He continued to work on the neck and back of Tomko with another chinlock.  Tomko back to his feet powered out with an elbow. Jordan leap frogged over Tomko but he got it with an extreme short clothesline from Tomko. Jordan then countered with a backbreaker. Jordan followed with a guillotine sleeper for the win.

Knock Outs match .... Sarita vs Tara in a revenge match....Tara won with a cheap shot.

RVD vs Hardy vs A.J. Styles... non title... you all know I am not a fan of either RVD or Hardy, just do not like watching them at all. So.... but Styles goofing around with the dude at ringside was funny, very funny. And Styles got the pin with the ropes... er um I mean I saw nothing but a win.
Because of the interruption of Mr. Anderson on Hardy, they had a small brawl at the end of the show.

OOOOHHHH does this mean Nash will be here tomorrow with the tag belts for the GNW event 

And the MotorCityMachine Guns!  in a four way tag match.  Dude, I hate trying to call matches like this. You know, maybe if you guys didn't freal around at the start of the show with so much filler, you could have had two separate matches for the tag division. vs Team 3D vs Ink Inc vs Beer Money Inc. 

Alex Shelley and James Storm started off. Okay Mr. Shelley what colour are your tights now? One camera has them looking blue and orange, one camera has them looking purple and an off orange. Someone needs to check the white balance on the cameras seriously.

They started with a collar tie up, Storm pushing Shelley into the corner. Shelley came back with a series of forearms to the face getting himself out of the corner. Yay! Storm then tossed him into the ropes but Shelley went to the mat for a slip through and roll away. Chris Sabin tagged in grabbing Storm and throwing him out of the ring. The Guns! then delivered double mule kicks to Robert Roode as he came into the ring. Beauty! They then did their trademark suicide dive (Sabin diving through the ropes Shelley holding them) which is impossible to get a screen capture of I have to say. Did get a screen capture of Mr. Shelley celebrating the move. Sabin then rolled Storm back into the ring, but only got a two count. Damn it.  Storm fought back with a thumb to the eye and just tossing Sabin into the corner. Devon then blindtagged himself in, as Roode tagged in.  Roode came at him with a punch but it got him nowhere. Devon then took control with a series of punches. They then traded blows for a moment. Hang on, are your tights half blue and half purple? Roode took control with a knee to the gut, before Devon used a scoop slam/power slam for a near fall, Shelley in for a save with what I think was a ping to the temple. Brother Ray then tagged in, and they used a double team move on Roode. Shanon Moore blindtagged himself in when Ray got too close to the rope, flying over him in a crossbody to land on Roode, only got a two count. Mr. Shelley what the hoovers was that you crossing yourself dude... I didn't realize there were vampires in the ImpactZone that day. It looked like Moore had control of the issue, but Roode got him with a wristlock then a kick to the gut sending Moore into the corner then out of the ring.  Storm continued to do a beat down on Moore outside of the ring. Back in the ring, and Roode stompping on Moore, just before Storm tagged in and they used a double team back elbow on him. Beer Money then went for a wicked looking reversed backbreaker ... guess you call it a gut wrencher... Storm going for a cover but Brother Ray breaking it up. Storm then used an upper cut knocking Moore back down as Roode tagged in. Roode then with a snapmare on Moore before slapping on a chinlock. Moore fought out with a series of elbows then off the ropes for a sunset flip but only got a near fall. Roode answered with a hard running clothesline, but only got a near fall. Another tag to Storm, who used a few knees to the guts then went right back to working on the back and neck of Moore with another chinlock. Moore once again fought out with more elbows, then used a standing bulldog on Storm. Roode tagged in, Jesse Neal tagged in.  Neal with a series of short clotheslines and a large back body drop before turning his attention to the Guns! in the corner sending them off the apron with more clotheslines. Neal then used a frontal swing slam. (I'm not sure what else to call it) Only got him a two count before Storm ran in for the save. BMI then used a double team move on Neal, as Brother Ray tagged himself in with double running clotheslines on BMI.  Neal then used a schoolboy roll up on Ray but the Guns! in for the save. Guns! with their trademark stereo kicks to Ray, Devon then in with a series of punches to both Shelley and Sabin, before Shelley with a drop toe hold and Sabin with a standing flying elbow to the back. NICE! They then followed it with their trademark double teamed basement dropkick/semi-pull back. Sabin then with the stepladder dropkick on Storm in the corner knocking him off the ring apron. Sabin then on the apron was going for his wicked kick on Roode but Roode swept the leg out and dragged him down hard on the ring apron face first. Is Sabin okay? Slingshot clothesline by Shelley then on Roode. Back in the ring, Neal was pounding on the back of Devon in the corner before Ray came in with a hard punch. Neal then on the shoulders of Ray, Devon off the top turnbuckle for a flying short clothesline, going for the cover but Moore in for the save. Moore got planted in the top turnbuckle for his trouble. Ray then slapped Neal and charged at Moore in the corner, Moore got out of the way as Ray went face first into the turnbuckle. Moore off the top rope with a twisting neck breaker, Neal then with a gore for the win.

My Thoughts on TNA Impact for May 3rd 2010-Highlights

Yeah I know it's a full week late. I have been searching between iTunes Canada and the official Spike TV website since last Tuesday morning.  Spike had it at noon today. 

Remember my Spudguns,  if you didn't hear it already,  it's official IMPACT IS MOVING BACK TO THURSDAYS   STARTING THIS WEEK!    So from what I understand, there will be NO episode tonight (May 10th Monday)   But there will be one on this Thursday May 13th
I hate watching the show this way,  cause it's like watching stop animation there are so many digital mess ups and buffering and ..... ggrrr!
Jay Lethal... oh my!  Did he finally drop the frealing gimmick?  That would be nice... um Jay thinks he's the Nature Boy now.... loud groan. Well, at lest he looks hot in a suit. Finally he got rid of the sparkly moo-moo!  I can get behind that I can totally.  Dude! what the hell?  It keeps skipping... serious.  The first segment with Lethal kept jumping to the next segment.
Hey did I ever tell you that my ex Dargo looked just like Robert Roode..... Everytime someone else logs on to the website it causes a traffic jam and craps out the show for me. Who's the security hottie with the tattoos?

(Dude! when iTunes Canada gets this for download I will re-do this post. This is just a mess with the stopping and skipping and ggrrr)

Kendrick/Williams  vs Jessie Neal/Shanon Moore (Ink Inc) .... Jessie Neal won with a spear on Kendrick

Knock Out tag team Beautiful People vs Tara/Sereta/Wilde... BP's win with a cheat of a double teamed DDT

A.J. Styles  vs Abyss.... Styles won with a distraction from Flair and Chelsie

Wolfe vs RVD....RVD won and keeps his championship

And the MotorCityMachine Guns!   They were in a 3 way tag match against Beer Money Inc and Team 3D....  Sabin was spring boarding off the top ropes in this amazing flips that must have gotten a height of at lest 6 feet (off the top rope which would have put it what...in the rafters) Mr. Shelley blue and orange????  You know what with the bad colouring on this website and the stopping digital scrambledness of it... did I see right was Mr. Shelley bouncing on the second rope like it was a playground toy?  Nash and Hall came down got the match thrown out, then Mr. Yummy...er Eric Young is with Nash's crew now... and dude,  blue and orange tights really???

And The Winner is By CountOut

Or Hail Sabin Volume 5

I used screen capture for this post

It's a question I need to ask myself  "why do I try to see who you all want to see more of on here when Chris Sabin wins everytime?"
It was a small voting population, but Mr. Sabin won the poll for this years "This Blog's Sexiest Man (wrestler) Alive"  proving once again, that nobody comes here for me, they only come here to read about Mr. Sabin.   I don't blame you actually, as he's much prettier then I am.

So you know what this means Eh?   It means I have to think of something new to nag him lovingly about other then his hair so that there is something to chat about in regards to him.
I'll think of something.  I will.  But as always, remember the rule,  it can only be something that happens on Impact. NOTHING PERSONAL! Only allowed to nag about stuff from the show- which is why hair and wardrobe are totally fine to nag about.   

With that said, I'll be back Backstreet.

Enjoy Your Hunk

I used screen capture for this post


Since it seems this is all I am good for....

A screen shot from the April 12th 2010 episode.
Yeah, iTunes Canada finally had it available for download.   Full week late.  Let's hope tonight's isn't too late (anything past Wed morning is late)

About those Tag Team belts

I used a screen capture for this post

Dear Mr. Sabin and Mr. Shelley

Last month I posted that if I did not see those tag team belts around your waists soon, there would be hell. Well, it's been a month, and you still have no TNA belts, so I must rant and nag...

What do you mean you lost your match to Matt Morgan the evil druid and Amazing Red? How could you let them beat you? You're better then that. Much better, you know it, I know it, the fans know it, most important you know it. (wait I said that didn't I?) I was sitting there watching the show (April 12th 2010 episode) thinking for sure this time. I mean man, the odds were stacked FOR YOU, what happened? Okay so this is more a whine then a rant but... what's going on? Where in the production notes did it say "Sabin gets pinned" that makes no sense, none. I'm going to pretend that Red ad-libed that part of the production notes, cause... why man why?

Is it your schedule? Are you too busy to hold those belts right now? Is it because of your injuries? Are you unable to hold those belts right now cause you are not healed enough from your injuries to be fighting champs?
Are the belts not pretty enough and you think they would clash with your tights? You could wear jeans to the ring that would look good with the belts would it not?

Are the belts too heavy on your hips cause your waists are so tiny? That's okay, they can take the belts in or you know you could wear them around your neck like you did your New Japan Jr Tag belts. You made those look sexy all wrapped like a winter scarf.

Dude! Come on already and win the TNA Tag Team belts!!! You should have had them like ten times by now but; no you just keep teasing me with being the number one contenders for the tag belts and then don't follow through making me disappointed with you. Why do you keep teasing and taunting me like that with promises of you being the TNA Tag champs then not doing it? .... It's cause I am Canadian isn't it? Have I not shown enough support and love to you guys?
You are the greatest tag team in the last 20 years, so why have you not won those belts yet?

My Thoughts on TNA Impact for April 12th 2010

I know the column is getting later in the week every week. iTunes Canada still does not have it, but Spike official website finally does so here we go...

And the first question of the night is Why ... why are you wasting my time? Then there was a lot of crap I didn't pay any attention to until I saw Brother Ray come down to the announce booth ... then he said their match was a street fight and I lost interest again...It was Team 3D/Jessie Neal vs Nash and his boys... and we are suppose to believe that that so called distraction by that Bubba feller was just .... dude I run faster then that and I'm handicap... Then Mr Yummy... er  Young came down with a hockey stick. How very Canadian of you, do it again!

Shannon Moore vs Kaz. They started with a collar tie up, which lead to Moore in the corner. Moore got a second collar tie up and a front slam on Kaz before starting to work on the arm of Kaz with a wrist lock. Kaz managed to reverse it and put him in a side headlock, hanging onto the dreadful hairdo for a hiptoss take down. Moore managed to break out of that hold and went right back to working on the arm of Kaz with a series of hard elbows. He got an armdrag on Kaz sending him across the ring before going back to work on the left shoulder. This went on for a few minutes in a back and forth sort of way. He then got an inverted atomic drop on Kaz backing it up with a leg drop before getting him in the corner with a series of shoulder blocks. Kaz battled out and got the top rope down sending Moore flying to the floor. Back in the ring and Kaz slingshots himself back with a legdrop on Moore but only a two count.   Kaz followed through with three slams into the corner then a suplex but still only got a near fall. Moore tried then for a crossbody but was cut short by landing on Kaz's knee. Moore was going for a aerial move but it took both men down to the mat. Moore then got a clothesline, spin kick and a drop kick on Kaz knocking him to outside of the ring then used a moonsault on him. Both men down. Back in the ring, and Moore went for another high risk move but Kaz caught him and used a modified necktie/bridge only getting the two count. Moore went for his corkscrew moonsault but Kaz managed to kick out. And we hit a time limit no one won.  Wow. That's impressive actually, when was the last time on television that happened?

I've said this a million times, I love Jay Lethal as Jay Lethal. Please please please drop the gimmick, get rid of the damned sparkly moo-moo. I mean man, isn't your throat sore after 3 years of doing that voice? 
 He teamed with Pope...er was suppose to but Beer Money Inc kind of used a backstage five minute beat down on Lethal. Hey maybe when Lethal comes to from the bottle shot he'll be old Jay again?

Knock Outs in a nontitle match.... don't care and damn it can't even fast forward cause I'm watching on the official website.

Robert Roode vs  the guy I don't like so... moving on.
Pope vs A.J. Styles/Wolfe in a handicap match. ... or you know not as Wolfe got a steel chair to the back as he was coming to the ring.  Well what do you expect with 4 minutes on the show and this being the main event and all, not like they were actually going to give us a match or anything.  Oh look Styles removed the damned cufflinks from his ears. Maybe he's listening to my fashion advice after all. Pope tossed Styles off the ramp onto the rails, then face first into the stairs. Finally get into the ring, Pope has Styles on his shoulders but Styles used a rake to the face to brake the hold then used a kick to the back of the skull. Flair disrupted the match and a dq was called.

And the MotorCityMachine Guns! vs Matt Morgan the evil druid and Amazing Red.  Alex Shelley and Matt Morgan started it off, with w collar tie up, Shelley getting tossed like a ragdoll.  Shelley came back at him with a series of kicks but got caught with a simple shoulder block. Chris Sabin ran in but was greeted with a short clothesline both MMG are down on the mat. Morgan picked up Shelley holding him in his hesitation slam then dropped him hard where upon Shelley landed on Sabin. Dude are you two okay? Both Guns are out of the ring now. Red tagged in as did Sabin, who had Red in a side head lock. Sabin bounced off the ropes with a shoulder block to Red, then the two played leapfrog for a few seconds before Red used a headscissors tossing Sabin to the corner. Shelley tagged back in. Red got him with a hard kick to the back of the skull/neck. Dude again is he okay? Sabin came in, Red slid out of the ring, Sabin with a wicked kick from the apron flipping over Red. Beauty! Just Beauty! Back in the ring and Sabin gets a two count. Red fights back landing a hard mule kick to the jaw of Sabin sending him rocking but the Guns! managed to use a double team move on him but still only a two count.  Morgan tagged himself in and Sabin went right for him with a series of forearms but got a stiff elbow for his troubles. Shelley came in to help and got footprinted to the face. Oh God! Is Sabin alright? Morgan picked him up by the back of the neck and just slammed Sabin face first off the top turnbuckle, causing him whiplash. He then went for a stack up in the corner but the Guns! managed to slid on the second rope and get out of the way. Shelley went for a crossbody, Sabin coming in to help with the pin but Morgan tossed them both like butter. Red tagged in, Sabin is now the legal man, Red used a floatin and a sunset flip but Sabin answered with a kick to Red's face. Shelley in with a charge to the corner but Red kicked him then used a flying DDT. Sabin in, but got flipped inside out by Morgan who ran into the ring. Morgan then was setting Shelley up for his trademark hellevator but Red stole the win with a Code Red on Sabin.  Hang on!  Mr. Shelley Mr. Sabin what did I say to you like a month ago on here, if I didn't see those belts around your tiny little skeleton waists soon I was going to send you angry letters... oh I feel a rant coming on in the next post I do.

The highlight of the show this week for me was watching the little crawl screen updates that Spike Official website has at the bottom of the video.  Lovely seeing what the rest of you zombied perverts were watching while I was trying to do this review. Not even Mr. Shelley could keep my attention tonight for more then a few seconds.

My Favourite Matches

I used screen capture for this post


You have all heard me saying for the last few months how unimpressed I am with the whole direction TNA Impact has gone. I keep complaining but no one is bothering to listen. Or are they? I read other fan sites and I know I am not the only one who feels this way. So, this will be a new column; don't worry, I'll still do the weekly review of the new Impact episodes every week; but this new column will be about matches from old episodes that I thought rocked. So let's kick 'er off shall we.

X-Division Match from Sept 14th 2006
Alex Shelley vs Chris Sabin

We start with an armbar on Sabin who countered with his roll through flip, reversing it on Shelley before taking him down to the mat. Shelley managed to kick off putting distance between them both. We move into a side headlock on Shelley, who broke the hold going back to working on Sabin's shoulder before sweeping out the legs from under Sabin. Shelley then had control of the match by standing on Sabin's wrist. Back to a standing position, and Sabin switches it putting another side headlock on Shelley. Sabin then off the ropes with a hard looking shoulder block sending Shelley down. Sabin then uses his cartwheel/armdrag tossing Shelley across the ring. Shelley then bounces off the ropes with his spinning underarm hook, following it with a knee to the stomach. He then put Sabin face first into the top turnbuckle before the counter of a headscissors sending Shelley outside of the ring. Suicide dive by Sabin knocks both men out for a moment. Back into the ring and Shelley delivers a hard forearm to the side of the skull of Sabin, rocking him. They back and forth with the forearms for another few moments. Shelley breaks the rhythm with a rake to the eyes, snapmare and a kick. It only gave him a two count. Shelley then went for a double leg takedown before landing one of his beautiful moonsaults, which missed. Sabin then is flipped over the top rope to land on his feet on the apron, giving Shelley a fist to the jaw before setting up his springboard dropkick. Shelley stumbled back into the corner and Sabin came charging at him with a straight kick to the side of the skull. Both men are tangled in the ropes. Sabin gets his wits about him and hangs Shelley in the tree of woe for his hesitation drop kick. Beauty. He got a two count but Shelley grabbed the bottom rope for the break. Nice. Shelley then comes back with his mule kick and a running drop kick. Lethal/Dutt/Devine case a small distraction letting Sabin use a rollup small package for the win.

 What I liked about this match, it was no-nonsense. Even with the little distraction at the end it still focused on the men in the ring. This was at a point when Chris Sabin had held the X-Division belt only twice and Alex Shelley had been tagged up with Johnny Devine as the Paparazzi. I actually liked the paparazzi angle Shelley was doing at that time, it was different and somehow natural. It seemed to me though that they were just tossing him with anyone trying to create a tag team that never really gelled. (Nash, Devine, Aries) Sabin and Shelley as the MotorCityMachine Guns! Beauty. Like a gift from Dionysus.  Shelley and Sabin against each other in a match, genius pure and simple. 

My Thoughts on TNA Impact for April 5th 2010

I used screen capture for this post. 

iTunes Canada was 3 days late again.  Dude, are you going to do this on the weeks of every live show? We have readers on this blog. Not as many as I would like, but readers none the less. Maybe I need to bring back the Sabin hair gimmick and get the return of the Sabin fans to the blog?

So we have a pointless flashback from last week then we go to an interview with the Knock Outs. Okay, you all know my rule about talking about the Knock Outs, but honestly, where are they all?  Velvet Sky was saying how they -the TNA Knock Outs- have revolutionized the business, but in the last 4 months I have not seen anything new or revolutionary from the TNA women's division. It looks like the same stale old dren that the other company offers.  I was impressed back 3 years ago when the Knock Outs made their debut, now my fast forward button can't go fast enough.
Fix the frealing opening already it's still crap. No, I'm not difficult to please, just bored. Dude I have been a fan for 31 of my 36 years on this planet, and I really do not want to see the same stuff over and over and over again. On the rare time I do, I buy the dvd.  All you're giving me is old production notes from WCW with a fresh slice of moldy cheese on the plate.

Our first match which was by the by is after the 20minute mark;  has already started and is between Storm and RVD.  Storm sends RVD into the corner, RVD floats over then puts a boot to the face of Storm. RVD uses his roll through/monkey flip to toss Storm across the ring. Storm sent RVD into the other corner but RVD countered, sending Storm off the ring apron with a kick. He then went for a baseball slid, but Storm caught him and slammed him into the rails. RVD used a shoulder block from outside the ropes but Storm countered with a mid rope DDT. He went for a pin but only got a two count. Storm followed this with a vertical suplex, and a rear chin lock in the middle of the mat. RVD fought out of it, and was going off the ropes, Storm tried for a knee to the jaw but RVD grabbed his leg going for a roll up.  Only a two count. RVD then used his trademark spinkick before both men started trading fists. Another high spin kick from RVD which gave him a chance to set up for his rolling thunder. Storm managed to come back with a spinning heel kick to the skull and a the eye of the storm. RVD came back with a front slam and his split legged moonsault for the win.  Boo.

Homicide vs Rob Terry for the Global title. He's calling himself the Freak? Dude, really? Homicide did not wait, he jumped him as the bell was being rung. Kick to the stomach followed by a chop, did nothing. Much as the next set of chops. Homicide went off the ropes but ended up with a clothesline for his troubles. Terry followed this up with a choke slam that sent Homicide flying across the ring. Homicide then tried for a monkey flip but failed, before Terry got him in a long held press slam. Homicide then got tossed the other end of the ring via a deep hip toss. Homicide tried for a corner move but was caught in a front slam.  Terry got the win. What the freal was that?  I'm talking the end of the Global match, which had Terry standing there bleeding from a evil harsh chair shot that by the by never took him down, didn't even phase him,  but the fact Orlando Jordan came out with I don't even want to know what splattered on him... What the freal is the deal with Jordan? No second thought, I don't want to know at all.  Just toast him already.

Knock Outs match... don't care. Tara won the first round getting a key to a locked box she got her spider back . Daffnay won the second round getting a key to a locked box she lost and had to do a strip tease. Velvet Sky won round three got a key to a locked box, she got the open contract to any match. Angelina Love won the final round getting a key to the locked box she won the belt.

Ladder match between Kurt Angle and Mr. Anderson. Anderson jumped Angle, and had him down in the corner where he was stepping on his throat before using a punch/kick combo. The bell was then rung and we see Anderson with Kurt Angle on his shoulders for a drop roll. The ladder was then brought into the ring, as Angle started to show some fight. Anderson then suplexed him onto the ladder. Kurt recovered enough to give Anderson a belly to back suplex on the ladder himself. Kurt then followed it up with a few closed fists before starting to send Anderson into the ladder, but Anderson ducked and reversed it sending Kurt face first into the ladder. Anderson then started up the ladder, but was not high enough as Kurt grabbed him for an Angleslam.   Anderson is now outside of the ring on the floor. Kurt was at the top of the ladder, Anderson came back in toppling it and Kurt went over the top rope hit the apron and fell hard onto the floor.  Dude that was like a 14 foot drop! The crowd started to chant  "holy s**t" which the censor crew could not censor proper. Anderson back up the ladder, somehow Kurt got up and onto the top turnbuckle drop kicking the ladder out from under Anderson. Both men down and with good reason. Kurt back up to his feet with a over head suplex on Anderson. How is he even breathing let alone standing? Kurt placed Anderson on the ladder and went back to the ropes for a top rope moonsault. He picked up Anderson and tossed him shoulder first into the ring post, and started up the ladder again.  Anderson the used the chain of Kurt's metal to choke him out. Anderson then climbed up for the key that was hanging there.

Okay I adore Jay Lethal.  As Jay Lethal not as Macho Man. Please, please please drop the gimmick.  I have been begging you to, nagging you to drop the gimmick for the last year and a half.   Just drop the gimmick and be the old Jay Lethal.

Anyone else feel like just watching old episodes of the Trailer Park Boys?  or Durham County?
 Pope's promo was good.  Dude, I will find a way to get your trenchcoat righty-ho righty-ho.

Doug Williams  vs Generation Me in a gauntlet match.  My money's on Williams as I really don't care much at all for Generation Me. Jeremy started dude two words for you 1) hair  2) cut Williams used an armbar but Jeremy countered causing Williams to go for the ropes to break the hold. Williams then took out the legs of Jeremy sending him into the corner, but Jeremy countered with a moonsault/cross body combo. Williams came back at him with a simple open hand slap getting him against the ropes but Jeremy got a boot up landing it square in Williams face. This he followed up with a outside shoulderblock and a springboard powerbomb planting Williams face first. Williams shook it off and used his chaos theory suplex for the win of this first round. 
Second round was Max who used a suicide dive to get into the ring landing on Williams. Max then ducked a clothesline before using a drop kick but only got a two count. Williams was then sent across the ring hitting the one corner then the other as Max went for a scoop slam and a flying leg drop. Williams then out of nowhere used a front choke small package forcing Max to tap.  Yay. I like Williams.

Wolfe vs Pope.  Wolfe did not wait and ran down the ramp at Pope, but was greeted with a hard fist. Wolfe was thrown into the ring, but still managed to get an upper cut on Pope as he was climbing into the ring, getting the advantage. Pope fought back but was cut short by a knee to the chest followed by Wolfe's flying hammerlock. Pope was placed on the top turnbuckle where upon Wolfe used his double chop setting up for the tower of london but it was countered. They got out of the corner, with Pope using a open palmed thrust. Pope followed that up with his DDE for the win.  Then Styles came out of nowhere looking normal for the first time in months knocking into Pope and the camera man who got crushed under everyone.

And the MotorCityMachine Guns! vs Team 3D for the number one contenders spot. Chris Sabin and Brother Ray started off with a collar tie up which Brother Ray turned into a armbar.  Sabin countered it reversing it on him. Mr. Sabin Have I nagged yet about the boots? No well consider this me asking what the hell is up with those laces you wear? I know you've been doing the footwear like that for awhile now but ... Brother Ray managed to roll out of it, landing a hard right on Sabin's jaw. Sabin countered with a series of forearmss and kicks, looking like he had things under control, but he didn't. Brother Ray placed one perfectly timed boot to the face sending Sabin hard to the mat. He was going for a second round, but Sabin rolled and got him with a mule kick.  Beauty. He backed it up with a springboard cross body but it only got him a near fall. Alex Shelley tagged in and they used a double team move on Brother Ray. Brother Ray came back at Shelley with a vicious chop sending him staggering back and then tagged in Devon. Devon had Shelley down on the mat, using a headbutt to the lower back for added pressure. Shelley was heading for a tag but was cut short when Devon grabbed him slapping on a bear hug. He broke the hold and landed a kick to the jaw of Devon, rocking him. Sabin tagged back in crossing to the far corner with a forearm to Brother Ray before turning his attention back to Devon with a running forearm. Brother Ray came back into the ring, Sabin caught him with a mule kick then went to the top rope for a double drop kick on them both. Brother Ray got to his feet and went charging but Sabin ducked and Brother Ray continued on landing the clothesline on Devon in the corner. Sabin then used a flying kick to the back of the skull on Brother Ray, before turning his attention back on Devon. Double team from him and Shelley on Devon with their stereo kicks. Shelley tagged back in and went off the top rope for a cross body while Sabin held Devon in a neckbreaker. Got only a two count. Brother Ray then from behind with a double clothesline taking both MMG to the mat. He then picked up Sabin in a scoop slam as Devon went to the top rope landing a What's Up on Sabin.  Boo. Then Nash and his boys came down to the ring ruining the match. Double Boo. And you can see that Shelley got marked up but it didn't work proper because he had been sweating.

So to sum up my thoughts this week,  if you are downloading from iTunes and missing the old TNA like I am,  just skip this week and down load the episode from June 18th 2006.  Which was a great episode...

There's no happy ending

*deep sigh*

There is no happy ending.

My friend's mom, whom I respect completely, hated my novel. It made her uncomfortable.

Characters I created, that I spent the last year working on, pouring my soul into made her want to puke.

There is no happy ending. I put my lead character- Protagonist- through hell. I put my Antagonist through hell. The same hell actually. And one character I was told is redundant. The character of Cole, who is based on my buddy Joshua, my friend's mom and my editor by the by, feel that the story is being blocked by having him in there.

I can't seem to win.

Okay here is the deal. I'm not as creative as I wish I was. I need a guy in my life to feed the creativity. I need to be in a relationship, or at the very least crushing on someone. This blog over the past year proof of that. I mean, man really the most interesting posts on this frealing thing have nothing to do with me and everything to do with either the bad dates I had over the summer or my addiction to Mr. Shelley and Mr. Sabin.

So what do I do now? I'm trudging through the re-writing of draft 3 and my heart is no longer in it. I have been working towards this point for the last 15 years.

15 years! Since the first time I had some of my poems published in high school. Yes, I am that old. Most writers have cranked out four or five full length novels by this age and not still struggling to get noticed.

I got asked today ironically "what would Jane do?"
What Would Jane Do? Well, I think Jane Austen would have laughed. She would have laughed and then dug up a pile of potatoes. Cause by this age, she had 4 of her novels published and had already turned down one offer of marriage. See, massively ahead of me in a time when women couldn't own anything.

What did I do? I drank 3 glasses of wine and cried.

Meanwhile in a messy room across town part 4

Got the Alice Cooper on, sitting here feeling like I should be writing.
Yes, the whole cycle has started again. I have about 4 different ideas rolling around in this brain of mine, and have no idea which one to play with.
I should be working on the next draft of my current novel, but I'm waiting for all the notes from my Editor before I do.

So, in the mean time... I made a Chick Pea Curry for dinner. I've never made curry before so this was interesting. I did not have any Cumin, instead I added extra Turmeric. My kitchen has not smell this good in god knows how long.
I think I just want to boil Turmeric instead of burning incense for rituals and meditation from now on, it smelled that good.

If we broke down the recipe of me it would look something like this

Writing (books and blogs)
Wrestling
Vampires
Food

I'm wondering if I can combine all those somehow? Don't ask, I don't know. I'm trying I am really. It's late and now I'm sort of babbling like a goof. But that's okay, cause come Monday I have to stop everything. I do.
Come Monday, I am that much closer to another decade. Yes, the big evil happens on Monday.

I turn 36 on Monday. I know all my silliness over Mr. Shelley and Mr. Sabin has to stop. I will officially be too old. I have no idea what I am going to do with myself once Monday comes.
I really will have nothing to talk about but my book and cooking.
God, I will go insane! Like honestly, for real insane. Unlike the light drizzle of creepy-chic I am now, and ... well can't someone just hire me for comedy? Then you know I could continue being the total freak I am... right? No? Yes? Maybe?

Yummy ...

Please head over to comedy central... er um I mean My Newfie Kitchen to see the latest episodes of my cooking videos.

Episode 2 is my challenge to the MMG
Episode 3 is my Ugly Ramen
Episode 4 is making homemade Bread

They're funny funny things.
Life should be about food, laughter and bad camera work. Always.

The sun has faded

I used screen capture for this post.

I will hope that someone has finally gotten the hint with my screaming every week, that the MotorCityMachine Guns! do not get enough air time.
I love them. My Spudguns love them. It's why we're here. To be the sick puppies we are and get crazy when we see them.

I have been saying for months that they need to have the tag team titles. And if I don't see those belts around their tiny waists in the next few weeks; someone is getting an angry letter. (Mr. Sabin, Mr. Shelley) Oh yeah, you don't want to make a Canadian angry cause we will have you neck deep in paperwork. Plus the paper cuts sting like hellfire, and you can't hold your Tim Hortons roll up the rim to win coffee cup proper.

I was glad to finally see them have a promo on this weeks episode (March 15th 2010) cause it has been 3 whole months since they did a promo. Little short for my taste, but then again I could watch them read the lyrics of a Headstones cd. Or you know cook.

Hey... you know how alot of novels go to audio book; well, do you think in a million years from now when my novel finally gets published and sees the bright neon lights of a book store Mr. Shelley will do the voice reading of it? (actually things are on course enough that it might be out by next year this time)

My Thoughts on TNA Impact for March 15th 2010

I used screen capture for this post.

iTunes Canada had it at a decent time this week.

I still hate the opening credits. You have one shot of the MMG and it's in the uber speed, which you can only see on iTunes with pause. No cookies for the editing team. None.

We open with A.J. Styles.... now you're just doing the bad earrings to bug the snot out of me.
Why the freal is that painted waste of flesh on my screen? Yes I am the only wrestling fan on the planet who frealing hates that painted up freak. I could rant on but...

I get it, now I know why Mr. Shelley and Mr. Sabin are too thin, the food service gets destroyed before them or any of the other X-Division guys can have supper. I never picked up on that before with the million times a food fight breaks out.

Team 3D vs Nasty Boys/Jimmy Hart. ....bored now. Team 3D brought back in Brother Runt. Nasty Boys cheated for the win.

Mr. Anderson/Wolfe vs Kurt Angle/Pope. Angle and Wolfe started it off. Collar tie up into a chickenwing which was revised by Angle who took down Wolfe in a flip. It was countered by Wolfe, but Angle used a deep armdrag on him. Mr. Anderson tagged in with a series of stomps. Wolfe tagged back in, having Angle in the corner. Angle fought out and used a belly to belly suplex. Pope tagged in with a short clothesline, short running back elbows and an over head toss. Pope went for a cover but Anderson broke it up. Angle came in and put an Angle slam on Anderson and went for one on Wolfe but Wolfe countered, just as Pope grabbed Wolfe by the ankle for a roll up. Pope got the win. Angle landed wrong on his arm and was holding it in the mid-mark, looks like he might have broken it.

Now you all know I am vegetarian right? So why do you keep trying to feed me filler? I've told you before filler is for hot dogs not tv shows. You need new writers bad.

Knock Outs.... I don't care. Hey TAZ nothing wrong with being Pasty pale! You have any idea how much sunblock and years indoors it takes to get that pale?
Did I just hear the human cheese right?...Sting building TNA from the ground up? What? Wasn't Styles/Daniels/Sabin/Joe/Shelley there a good 3 years before Sting?

Kevin Nash vs Scott Hall. This was a 5 minute challenge. If Hall lasted 5 minutes in the ring, he won $25,000. He stayed at the far end of the ring for the first 2 minutes. Nash then laid in a knee and a series of forearms knocking Hall to the ropes. Hall came back with a few punches of his own, rocking Nash. Hall followed it up with a few short shoulder blocks. You all forget that Hall has been in JCW for the last few years so he's really not all that ring rusted as you might think. Nash fired back with a hard shoulder block of his own sending Hall to the mat. Picking him up, Nash got Hall into the corner with his trademark knees to the guts before using a series of elbows. Waltman ran into the ring taking out the knee of Nash. Eric Young then ran down for a save. Why the freal is Waltman so vulgar? He was ... you know what Not going to give him the blog time. Hall seems to have won... er still standing so he got the money.

Hernandez vs Beer Money Inc in a handi cap match. Jeff Jarrett as ref. BMI went right for him before the bell even rang, Storm ripping Hernandez's shirt off him as Roode laid in the punches. They put an inverted atomic drop on him, and a high double knee before going for the cover, but it was only a two count. They then switched off with choke holds while the other distracted Jarrett. Hernandez turned it around with a double short clothesline knocking them both down. He then used a shoulder block sending Roode across the ring. He then countered their double team move, sending them both over in an overhead. Hernandez was going for a border toss but ended up with Storm's foot in his face. BMI used their trademark DWI for the win.

Hey Foley while you have the clippers half the X-Division need a haircut!

Another painted up waste of flesh... he said he represents the tattooed? Oh hell no you do NOT represent me.

Abyss was the special enforcer between Styles and the waste of flesh... I really really don't care.


And the MotorCityMachine Guns! Yay! They had a promo. Though they came out in the outfits I thought the other week made them look odd. Mr. Sabin had the microphone, and I must say has really improved with his promo skills. That's worth a full plate of cookies and a cup of coffee. And then Mr. Shelley said they are great... that's funny, I thought you were a god. (to me Mr. Shelley is ) And then a bunch of guys I don't like came out and it was chaos. One of them jumped off the trust and landed on Mr. Shelley, is he okay?


... TNA you are sleeping on the sofa tonight cause you are in the doghouse with me.

My Thoughts on TNA Impact for March 4th 2010

I used screen capture for this post

iTunes Canada had it for download at a decent time this week.


They opened with a reminder that next week is the big move to Monday nights. I'll have some thoughts on that topic in a post all it's own later this weekend.

I'm watching this dren that is your filler and I can't help but hope there is going to be a big swerve by Styles soon. Please please please let A.J. Styles dump Flair. Please.

Back to raping Shakespeare this time they only went back a few years in scripts. Yeah, I know you had Eric Young do the cleaning of the toilets gimmick around 2006....

Yeah, this lead to Jeff Jarrett being in a falls count anywhere match against the creepy sex guy. In the men's room. I don't know if I want to touch that one. Morley was just tossing Jarrett from one end of the bathroom to the other. that sounds so wrong and it looked like Jarrett took a shoulder hit a little too hard. Morley pinned him for the win. yeah, um I found that nearly disturbing and oddly reminded me of the video Raspberry by I Mother Earth. It also reminds me of the bathroom scene you all did back in 2006 with Nash/Shelley/Aries...which was a hell of a lot funnier.
Second match for Jarrett was against Tomko. It started with a collar tie up and a side head lock on Jarrett which went smoothly into an off the ropes shoulder block by Tomko. He continued to work on the left shoulder of Jarrett, there was a small cut on Jarrett's face too by the by. Jarrett did manage to turn it around getting Tomko on the ropes, but it didn't last long, as Tomko used a running closeline. He got a two count with a flying armbar takedown, but Jarrett got a DDT on him. Jarrett then used a roll up for the win.

Doug Williams vs Rob Terry. Both guys got in each others face before the bell, then Rob Terry walked the length of the ring with Williams over head before slamming him down. He then slapped a bear hug on him, Williams got out of it for a few seconds, but was caught with a jumping leg larria. He then put a choke slam on him for the win.

Mr. Anderson... leave the comedy routines to the MMG and JB.

Anyone else find Hogan touching Abyss's arm a bit on the creepy sexual side? That was just a little too much.... I feel like I am watching a cult leader or something.

And no cookies this week for the editing crew. None. You did not need to have so many flashbacks.

Four corners match. Styles vs Wolfe vs Pope vs Abyss for the belt. Scheduled for one fall with a 30 minute time limit and we have 11 minutes on the show how does that work? Just when I thought Styles fashion sense could not get any worse he proved me wrong with that ugly robe. I really hope between now and Monday that A.J. looses that frealing robe in traffic or something that is just ugly. Pope and Styles started it off, with a high knee from Styles and a series of chops. Pope turned it around quick with a short shoulder block knocking Styles to the mat. Abyss and Wolfe tagged in. Wolfe tried a sunset flip but Abyss sat on him instead. Styles jumped in, but Abyss got them both with short closelines. Abyss then put a sideslam on Wolfe for a near fall, but Styles broke the pin. All four men in the ring now, and Styles and Wolf got tossed out. Back in the ring, Styles and Pope, the Pope down with Styles laying on the fists. Styles took the leg out from under Pope with Flair using a chair on him. Styles then put the figure four on him. The ref called it, giving the win to Styles. but um... there were two other guys in this match why did they not break the submission?

And the MotorCityMachine Guns! vs Generation Me vs Beer Money Inc vs Hernandez/Matt Morgan the evil druid. Chris Sabin and Jeremy started it off, with an armbar that Jeremy countered. Sabin countered right back then tagged in Alex Shelley where upon they used three double team moves in about 30 seconds. Shelley went for a cover but only got a two count. Jeremy turned it around again with another armbar then tagged in Max who used a moonsault to get into the ring and land on Shelley's shoulder. Another quick tag to Jeremy who did a double stomp on Shelley's arm before Shelley was able to tag in Sabin. They used a double team move off the second ropes on Sabin -a modified swingset- and went for a pin but Shelley broke it up giving Hernandez a chance to blindtag himself in. He then grabbed Max and power pressed him a few times before just dropping him over his shoulders to land hard in the middle of the ring. Morgan then tagged himself in who then got both members of Generation Me in a double choke and a boot to the face of James Storm before, Roode tagged himself in and got the roll up for the win. I wanna know, does Mr. Shelley read the production notes (I really don't want to say script) before hand, cause his reactions are amazingly vivid. It's like he's reacting as a fan would.

Torn Covers

I used screen capture for this post

So my novel is sitting in the hands of my editor. This is great, means I am that much closer to being published.
But it means I have some time to stress over the cover art now. The photographer I was talking to couple of months ago backed out. Yeah I know, I suck or something.
Anyway, that means I still have to find a solution for the cover.

I have been looking at iStockphoto the last few days but I haven't found anything that captures the spirit of what I want my book to say at first glance.

One thing is certain, it has to be black and white. That is the real deal breaker.
I would like someone who looks halfway like my lead character, simply because it is a romance. But because I am not under any contracts with any of the romance publishers, I do not have any requirements. I can be as different from the typical romance covers out there.

Too bad there are not any guys in this city to model who look like this.

Has Anyone Noticed this about... MotorCityMachine Guns! ?

I used screen capture for this post

Their last promo was the Dec 17th 2009 episode.
That is two full months ago.

How could you notice what I have noticed when they haven't been around.

Where have they been promo wise?

I am a Shelley/Sabin addict and I am long over due for a fix. These withdrawls are beyond brutal.

Nothing

You get to a point and everything you see makes one word come to your mind "retarded".

I realized this week when watching TNA Impact (Feb 18th 2010 episode) when seeing not just Alex Shelley's hair, but the hoodie Chris Sabin was wearing with the metal spikes, that I'm too old, way way too old for all this dren.

I kept looking at them like that thinking they looked completely retarded, and that it was the kind of thing happening when I was in high school and college, back in 1988-1995. A billion years ago.
And I suddenly got it.

I'm just too damned old for this. If I am looking at you and thinking "damn he is the sexiest man ever he just needs to get some style" wondering what the hell you are thinking, or even something as simple as I don't like blonde men, then it's just time to walk away. (the only time I found a blonde man attractive was the actor who played Spike on Buffy /Angel and that was massive bleach)

Yes I know, there seems to be alot wrong with me when it comes to relationships and how I view men. Men are these odd creatures that you are not suppose to actually have. More like window shopping. You go to the store see the display but you can't actually touch it because the glass is in the way. Men make me uncomfortable. Like I don't deserve to be around them.

I think that is why I like Alex Shelley so much. Beautiful window display, but the store is closed for the season.

You want to analyze me, go ahead. Rick (my dad) was gone 10 months a year for work, and when he was home he was never around. And when he was actually in the house, it was weird. More like having company over then having my dad around. This is why I would never be good at having a husband who travels for work. Yes that has everything to do with the fact dad cheated on mom. There now the world knows what my close circle already does. I don't think I have a single secret left. I have blogged everything.
No wait, one more secret to be revealed. I can not pick out gifts for men at all. I had gotten a very expensive gold lighter for Trainwreck even had his name engraved on it, he hated it. I had gotten a talisman for Dargo keeping in line with the fact he was an Occultist, he hated it. Again you can trace that back to Rick. You know how when your a kid and when Fathers day rolls around the teacher always has some arts and craft thing for you to do. Well, grade 4 - I was 10years old - and the project was a silk tie dyed handkerchief; I didn't pick the project the teacher was a hippie. And Rick tossed it in the trash right away, saying it was a waste of material.
Nice eh?
My dad should never have gotten married and had a family. I should not be here.
So in conclusion I pick the wrong men. Men who are liars, cheaters, abusive, and emotionally unavailable.

And I love wrestlers because they are safe. Totally off limits (or so everyone and their dog's grandmother keeps enforcing in my brain. I can't ever have a wrestler as a husband I'm not good enough) therefore I can't get hurt.

Now, I really have told you everything Spudgun. There is nothing left for me to let you in on. You know my weakness (Alex Shelley) you know my desires (Chris Sabin) you know my mistakes (every man I have ever gotten involved with) and you know how hard I have tried to matter.
You know how often I have begged for an interview with Chris Sabin, and gotten nowhere.
Not that it would really matter I suppose to anyone but me; getting to interview him. (Or any wrestler for that matter. ) Getting an interview with him would be nice would it not?
I think it would.

Can't you Spudgun just picture little old... er medium sized me sitting across a small table in an overly lit Tim Horton's Donut shop, madly trying to write down everything Chris Sabin was saying and doing, while trying not to knock over my extra large double double onto the floor or me or the notes, all the while resiting the urge to reach across the small table and mess up his hair. Just to see if it moves or is shellacked in place? That would be cool.

But he doesn't care.
Maybe I am not funny enough?

My Thoughts on TNA Impact for Feb 18th 2010

I used screen capture for this post

Yes, iTunes Canada had it for download at a decent time today.

We are coming off of the Against All Odds ppv. And I still hate the opening credits as it's got way too much cheese (Hogan) and where the hell are the MMG?

We open with the Pope who won the big 8 card stud match at the ppv. He is now the number one contender to A.J. Styles' championship. I like the Pope he has nice eyes, but then I got bored. Why, because Styles and Flair came out, and what the hell is up with those damned earrings? Are they cuff-links? You going drag on us or something there Styles? Damn, that's just tacky.

Knock Outs.... Daffney vs Tara. Non title... no not breaking my rule... Tara won by a DQ

TNA you are so like a guy, when I tell you how much I hate an element, you just go ahead an add more of that element. Like all the "backstage" filler crap. I frealing hate it! There is no need for it. You could have at lest 3 more matches in the time you use with the filler.

Orlando Jordan vs Samoa Joe. Why does Jordan look like a drowned rat? Jordan tried to jump Joe, but Joe was too smart for him and moved out of the way. Joe then got Jordan in the corner with a series of punches and kicks. Jordan then went for a cheap shot with a thumb to the throat. But Joe rebuffed with a running leg style closeline. Jordan then used a spinbuster on him turning it back in his favour. He then used a spinning neck breaker, and a knee drop but only got a one count. Samoa Joe turned it around once again with a series of closelines before Jordan slapped on a back breaker for the win. What? Hang on!

More filler, this time Abyss worried about why he was being called into the office, maybe it's because of the fact you are shedding like a cat all over the ImpactZone from playing with your hair all the time.
Which brings me to my next point at the 33 minute mark (remember iTunes Canada takes out commercials ) and there has only been 2 matches so far. Filler is for hot dogs not tv shows.

Abyss vs Jeff Jarrett for the mask. Yay. I have been saying for the past year that the mask needs to come off. we start with a collar tie up that led into a shoulder block from Abyss. Jarrett went for a kick but Abyss countered with a closeline. Jarrett was in the corner with Abyss going for his trademark shocktreatment, Jarrett countered with a kick to the back of the skull, landing Abyss on the ropes. Abyss slapped an inverted atomic drop on him, but Jarrett got the upper hand with a upper cut. Outside the ring now, and Jarrett went to use a steel chair only to have Abyss turn it on him. Back in the ring, the chair set up in the corner, but Jarrett was unable to use it. Both men went for a closeline, before Abyss got the sidewalk slam on Jarrett for a near fall. Jarrett went for a top rope move but got caught midair in a choke slam, still only a two count. Abyss then got slammed face first into the chair in the corner. And Bishoff sent half the locker room down for a 5 minute beat down on both. It was a Double DQ. I'm having such massive Deja Vu right now, thinking about WCW back 12 years ago and just waiting for the buckets of blood to be poured on Jarrett... and then the zombies were bringing Abyss to the office for tea.

Brutus Magnus and Rob Terry (big useless) vs Beer Money Inc. Brutus and Storm started it off. Brutus used a shoulder block then an irish whip on Storm, but Storm countered with a simple slap to the face. Storm in the corner with a boot to the jaw just before Big Useless from the outside with a closeline cheap shot knocked Storm down. (I still say Rob Terry can not wrestle) He tagged in then got a slam on Storm, before slamming him in the corner. { hey how about bringing in Steve Corino? Does he still wrestle? Don't ask where this idea came from for whatever reason it just did right now while watching this match} Brutus then blindtagged himself in. Storm then used a kick and a jaw breaker before tagging in Robert Roode. Roode was all over with a knee and a slam then they double teamed Rob Terry. They then used their finishing movie the DWI on Brutus for the win.

And more filler this time the human cheese gave Abyss some LSD or something telling him it's magick. I didn't realize this was a cartoon. I thought I was watching wrestling, seems I was wrong. BORED NOW! Hold on, did the human cheese just say it will make him the god of wrestling? That is Alex Shelley who is the god of wrestling... okay so I am very very bias. Taz and Mike Tennay said they have heard alot of speeches over the years but nothing like that, gee they were trying not to vomit too eh?

Daniels vs Kurt Angle. Daniels jumped him before the bell rang with a series of rapid punches to the chest. Angle fought back but Daniels surprised him with an open hand palm thrust knocking him off his feet. Daniels went for a sunset flip but Angle countered with the ankle lock. Daniels tapped out. Hell that was a short frealing match. What a rip off.

Samoa Joe got kidnapped. My money is on JCW... don't ask why.


And the MotorCityMachine Guns! Finally, where the hell have they been last few weeks? They tagged up with Kendrick and Doug Williams. vs Amazing Red/Generation Me/Kaz. Okay thank god you let him out of the Suicide mask. I for some reason am suddenly wanting to watch Dream a Little Dream starring Corey Haim and Corey Feldman. Oh my god, do you do these fashion gimmicks just to get under my skin? Really, Mr. Shelley, Mr Sabin we've had this talk before... Why do I bother when you clearly are just going to... anyway.... Doug Williams jumped Kaz just as the bell was being rung. He laid into him with a series of forearms. Kendrick got tagged in then dragged into the ring by Kaz. Where upon Kaz used a drop kick and an overhead on him. GM tagged in using a double team move on Kendrick before Alex Shelley tagged in. Lovely not sure about the hair though, He got caught up in a drop toe hold from Max(?) but countered it sweeping the leg out from under him going for an early pin with his armband but only got a one count. Shelley none the less get control and slapped a dragon wrist lock on him before tagging in Chris Sabin. They used a double team on him with Sabin going for a quick pin but only got a two count. He then shot Max into the corner but Amazing Red tagged in. (thank god I have a rewind button Red moves so frealing fast) Red got Sabin with a shoulder block from outside the ropes, using Sabin's back as a ramp to fly into the ring before trying a sunset flip on Sabin. Sabin countered but went for a kick only to have Red move out of the way. Red went for a roll up but Sabin kicked out. Red DDTed Sabin causing Shelley to come into the ring for a save. Red then punched Shelley in the jaw and Shelley fell off the ring apron (boo Red boo) Doug Williams then tagged in with a upper cut and shoulder block to Red. Followed by a suplex before going to the top turnbuckle. Red countered with a corkscrew kick knocking Williams over. Kaz then tagged in with a closeline and series of drop kicks turning it in his favour, then slapped a spinning neck breaker for a near fall before Kendrick broke it up. Generation Me then got into the ring acting like they were monkeys or something, at which point Sabin used a baseball slide -hesitation drop kick to break that up. Kaz and Sabin were the two in the ring and as Kaz went to spring off the ropes, Shelley grabbed him from outside the ring. The Guns then went for a double team but were thrown off by Red from the top turnbuckle. Williams and Kaz are now in the ring, Kaz using a slingshot to get the upper hand going for the pin. Kaz won the match. Hang on, who were the legal guys? And for those of us who forgot what Suicide.. I mean Kaz looked like...

If I started a rumour would You believe it

It was reported yesterday that Canadian singer Gordon Lightfoot was dead. Big Rumour.
The singer is very much alive and on tour. But because it was twittered faster then the speed of light, people believed it.

Shows you the power of not just the internet but of words. Rumours are not always a good thing, and other times they are the best thing to happen to you. Mr. Lightfoot was googled more in the last 24 hours then the normal celebrities that are at the google top list every day.


So the question I present to you is if I said something, would you believe me without question?

Example : If I tell you that Jay Lethal is currently working on a British sit-com would you question me? Would you suddenly google Jay Lethal ? Would you cause a twitter traffic jam on JB's twitter asking when the show will air and on what channel?

Wither it is true or not, I have you wondering. Is it really that far fetched? I mean, the TNA wrestlers are really popular in Britain and we haven't seen much of Jay Lethal on Impact as of late.

Example : If I told you I asked Chris Sabin to marry me, would you laugh it off? Given the amount I blog about Chris Sabin, it would make sense. I mean, why would I talk about one man so much if I wasn't really connected to him?

Wither it is true or not, I have you wondering. Is it really that far fetched? I mean, this is not an official TNA site, nor is it an official Chris Sabin site, so I 'm not getting paid at all to blog about them. So why would I spend so much time blogging about him other wise?

I could come up with a few more examples but why? And TO SET THE RECORD STRAIGHT I have no idea why Jay Lethal has not been on Impact as of late, and I sort of did ask Mr. Sabin to marry me. As a gimmick. But you know if he ever wants...

And in this corner

I used screen captures for this post

So it is awful... oooppss I mean official, TNA vs WWE on Monday nights starting in March 2010.

*clears throat*

You know my dear Spudgun what I think of the so called new direction my beautiful fabulous TNA has taken.

So I will give you the run down of what I would like to see more of when they hit the warzone next month.

Number 1 - More Mr. Shelley.

Number 2- More Mr. Sabin.

Number 3- More Ultimate X matches.

Number 4- More Desmond Wolfe

Number 5- More Beer Money Inc

Number 6- More Eric Young

Number 7- A. J. Styles coming to his senses and going back to his old gimmick

Number 8- I'd like to see the Return of Petey Williams

Number 9- Bring in Vampiro

Number 10- More of Mr. Shelley in those short tights he used to wear back few years ago. (remember he is the sexiest man alive. To me anyway. Dionysus in human form)

So that is my "what I want from you in this relationship TNA"

I'm fairly easy... Oh you so can not tell me that you weren't just drooling over the idea of Mr. Shelley in the shorts. I'm just brave (creepy) enough to admit it.