Flirting?

Seems I don't know how.

Studies say that when you flirt with someone with the intent to catch a mate you should always pick someone with the same level of attractiveness as yourself. but I don't want an ugly man!
And you should know when to pick someone to flirt with for the sake of flirting and for mate finding. there's a difference?
And you should only flirt with someone who will be interested in you. but if I don't flirt with him how am I going to know if he's interested ?

When it comes down to it, I am a shy girl. A shy girl who has both waited around for a guy to tempt me (which got me nowhere at all) and tried to tempt men (which also got me nowhere at all) Even when I come across as hotsauce { loud, abrasive, steaming} I am still a shy girl at the core. I have been called too wholesome by the Trainwreck that was in my life few years ago; and too Jane Austen for my own good by male friends.

So then where is the middle ground? We read in articles both in magazines and on the internet to be willing to make the first move and not be afraid of what society will think of us. Okay, done that and gotten nothing. Well, not nothing; I have gotten laughed at by a few men and even caused one to puke on his shoes.
Not the best ego booster.
These same magazines and internet articles then turn around and tell us to wait for the man to make the first move because they need to feel like they are in control of things. I am still waiting for that manly-man to introduce himself to me. Waiting Waiting Waiting....

For some reason, it seems to that most of these how to flirt manuals on the net these days are written by teenaged girls. How is it that a 14 year old in the middle of Iowa is better at the art of seduction then a middle aged woman? I have no clue but seems she's able to get a date for the weekend and I am stuck sitting around watching episodes of Lipstick Jungle.